The Scars to Prove It
by Potion
Summary: One accident brings all of Callie's skeletons into the light. Three weeks after their break-up, Arizona is just starting to figure them out. Calzona.
1. Three Weeks

Disclaimer: I don't own Grey's. Or any of the songs. Although I really wish I did...  
A/N: Alright, well... I was going to wait until I had this all written and my NCIS story was finished to post this, but with the flashback episode coming out soon I figured I may as well go ahead and post this. It has a lot to do with Callie's past, because at the moment we really don't know much about her life pre-season 2, and I know that's going to change with the next episode (which I'm really looking forward to). Anyway, I hope you like it, and please - let me know what you think, whether you like it or hate it or are somewhere in between. (:

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**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 1 : Three Weeks**

_"Busted bones, dreams and tears  
Tattoo my heart like souvenirs  
Life is just a word till you go through it,  
I've got the scars to prove it"  
"_I've Got the Scars to Prove It_" - The Roadhammers_

For the past three weeks, the room has remained nearly the same. The same clothes are still in a pile on the floor, the empty glass still sits on the nightstand by the bed, and the picture frame still lays face-down by the foot of the bed. Everything but the bed and the clothes in the closet has stayed completely untouched.

Work has been work. She goes in when she's supposed to and does her job, and she does it well. She's done some of her best work in the past few weeks. But that's all it's been - work. It hasn't been the same as it used to be, and all of the hospital staff - even those that don't really know her - can tell the difference. There's no music in her OR. She doesn't smile, she doesn't dance, her tone doesn't change when she asks for a scalpel, and her eyes don't light up while she sets a bone back into place. She doesn't care for the patients like she used to. She doesn't stand up for them against their family, she doesn't tell them they'll be okay, she just doesn't seem to _care_ anymore.

Everybody's noticed. She's kept herself from falling apart by throwing herself into her work, by distancing herself from everything and everybody. She's stopped eating lunch at their usual table, she's stopped relying on her friends like she used to, she's stopped trying to call her family. Mark's seen her go to George's grave more often and Addison has told him that they've been talking more than usual, but she won't tell him what about.

She'll barely even talk to him now. As far as Mark knows, she doesn't talk to _any_body about anything other than work, excluding Addison, and, if she absolutely has to at home, Cristina.

Three weeks is too long. Everybody hates seeing her like this. Everybody is _tired_ of seeing her like this.

He flips the switch and the room lights up for what he can only guess is the first time that day. Callie throws her arm over her eyes. "Shut that off," she orders, but her voice is weak and raspy and the words come out cracked.

"No." She feels the bed dip as Mark sits down gently beside her. "Come on, Cal. It's been three weeks. Let's go out."

Callie flips onto her other side so she's facing him. "Only if there's alcohol," she compromises, knowing he won't let it go this time, and slowly sits up as he nods in agreement. She doesn't miss the worried look that flashes across his face even though it's only there for a brief second. They've all been worrying about her lately, and it makes her feel guilty. She doesn't want them to worry; they don't _need_ to worry. She'll be fine. Eventually. She always is, isn't she? She always finds some way to bounce back. All she needs is a little bit more time, time that they need to give her.

"Joe's?" Mark suggests. Callie finds herself nodding as she grabs clothes out of her closet. She doesn't want to go to Joe's, not really, because anybody could be there and that's where this whole thing started. She doesn't want to deal with a bunch of people she knows right now, and she especially does not want to deal with _her._

"Give me thirty minutes," she says, heading to the bathroom to take a quick shower.

Mark runs a hand through his hair once she has disappeared through the doorway. She hasn't been the same lately, and the whole hospital has noticed it. _They_ want Callie Torres, bad ass ortho-surgeon back. _He_ just wants his best friend back.

-----

They step into Joe's, and as they do, Callie takes in a deep breath. She shouldn't be this nervous. It's just Joe's, and she has been here a million times before. She forces herself not to look around the restaurant, simply because she doesn't want to know if anybody she knows is in here. Instead, she silently follows Mark to their usual seats at the bar, her eyes fixated on his back.

Joe is starting to pour their regular drinks when Callie stops him by saying, "I'll take something a little bit stronger tonight." He nods in understanding and finishes pouring Mark's normal drink then her's. He slides them both onto the bar in front of them and she doesn't miss the slightly worried glance he gives Mark, or the small shrug Mark gives him in response. Even Joe has noticed, and that makes her feel worse about what she has put them through.

"Thanks for coming tonight," Mark says after taking a sip of his alcohol, focusing on Joe walking around serving the people around them instead of his friend.

"You wouldn't have let me say no." Callie forces a smile at him, then downs whatever it is that Joe poured for her. She wasn't paying enough attention to know what it was and frankly, she doesn't even care. She winces at the burn as it slides down her throat, but she likes the feeling. She's not much of a masochist, but there's something about the few seconds of pain that she can't help but like, especially when every part of her inside feels like it's falling apart.

Joe refills her glass and Mark watches, the concern once again etched on his face. "You know, it's probably better if we don't get drunk tonight," he tries.

"I don't have to go into work tomorrow," Callie refutes, "so it'll be okay." She's fully aware at the meaning behind his little hint. She respects it. She's even a little bit grateful. But right now, all she really wants to do is get drunk and forget about all of it, if only for a night. There's so much more to it than he knows, than he understands, and she just wants one night of peaceful sleep. Who cares if it has to be induced by large amounts of alcohol?

Mark sighs in defeat. He watches her circle the rim of her glass with one finger, then pushes away his own. If she's going to be drinking as much as he expects her to - and very rarely has she had less to drink than he thought she would - than it would probably be best for him to lay off his own drink a little bit. He orders a water instead, muttering a "Thanks" as Joe silently sets it down in front of him with a nod and takes the alcohol away.

They drink in silence. Callie finds that she both appreciates it and absolutely hates it. She likes that he isn't bugging her about the drinking or about her pushing everybody away, but she hates that she has this time to _think _and_ remember_. She doesn't want that. She wants to for_get_. That was the whole reason she even came. That, and she wants to try to convince him - no, _all_ of them - that she's fine.

Then something catches Callie's eye and she turns around towards the door to watch out of reflex. Blond hair meets her eyes. Blond hair that she is used to seeing every day, strands of it touching red hair she has never seen before. A hand she is used to holding in her's wraps around the redhead's waist. Lips that she is used to having pressed against her's are instead being pressed lightly against the redhead's cheek. Feet she are used to seeing walk towards her are walking away.

And then they are both out the door, the redhead whispering something and Arizona grinning in the way Callie was used to seeing before they shared a long night alone together.

And then she has turned around and shoved that clear liquid down her throat before Mark could even figure out what to say to her.

"Callie," he says desperately, wanting her to put down the glass and _look_ at him, _talk _to him.

She simply shakes her head, her hand still on the glass as she wants impatiently for Joe to refill it. "Not now," she says, the pain evident even through the slight slur of her words. "Maybe tomorrow. Not now." Her hand tightens around the glass as she swallows all of the liquid in it and holds it out for yet another refill.

This is where she met Arizona. This is where they had their first kiss, in that dirty bathroom, with her back inches from the sink. This is where they would come after work, sitting around a table with their friends, laughing and talking and -

She shouldn't be hurt; they've already broken up, so now, _now_ they're both free to do whatever the hell it is they want. And besides, it's as much her fault as it is Arizona's.

She shakes her head, this time at herself. _That's wrong_, she tells herself. "It's _all_ my fault," she mutters, thinking out loud more than anything, and Mark looks at her sympathetically.

The refill is down as soon as Callie realizes Joe finished pouring it moments ago. She doesn't want to explain.

Mark just sits and watches, his hand placed lightly on her shoulder. He's rubbing circles on her shoulder blade with his thumb, but it's more for his benefit than hers. He bites his lip and sighs as he silently hopes that he's not watching his best friend finally fall apart.

_"It is just wishful thinking  
That all this hard drinking  
Might lure you back to my ramshackle stable,  
__There's no point in trying...  
And if you know what's true  
__Then you know I love you."  
"_Hymn for the Alcohol_" - Hefner_


	2. Like We Never Loved At All

Disclaimer: Sorry to disappoint, but I still own nothing.  
A/N: Wow, I did not expect all of the feedback that I got... Thank you to everyone who reviewed, favorited, alerted, or just plain read this story! It really makes my day. (: Hopefully this chapter doesn't disappoint. (In case you can't tell - or, more importantly, in case you can - I am completely BSing my way through the medical stuff, haha. I just thought I should admit to that.) The next chapter should be up soon, and it will be a "flashback chapter," to help everyone understand a little bit of what went on with Callie and Arizona. Anyhow, enjoy!

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**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 2 : Like We Never Loved At All**

The pounding against her temple increases and Callie sighs. Maybe Mark was right and she shouldn't have had as much to drink as she did. It had been a momentary release, though; it had made her feel better, if only for a few hours. She is grateful for that.

She can hardly remember most of the night after seeing Arizona at Joe's and she assumes that is a good thing. It doesn't bother her. It is just one less night of pain that her memory will force her to relive, and not being able to remember was almost worth the hangover she gained. If she hadn't been called in on an emergency page, then it certainly would have been worth it. Today was supposed to be her day off, after all. Callie can hardly think over the throbbing headache, and who wants a doctor who can't concentrate?

As soon as she pushes open the door and crosses the threshold into the hospital she is handed a chart. She follows the nurse to trauma room one as the woman quickly briefs her on the patient, and Callie wishes she would just shut up because it's not like she can pay attention anyway. Ever since she opened the chart and flinched at seeing that familiar name, she has found it hard to concentrate on the rest of the information being thrown her way. Nobody told her that her emergency page was because of a nine-year-old girl. Nobody told her this was a PEDs case. Nobody told her she was going to be working with Arizona.

Honestly, Callie has considered herself lucky up until this point. For the past three weeks there have been only one or two instances in which she had to fix a child's bone, and in those cases it wasn't necessary for her to be around Arizona. And, like she had said all those months before, Seattle Grace Mercy West is a big hospital. She's managed to avoid the perky blond pretty well.

_Focus on the patient, Torres, _she tells herself over and over as she steps into the room. The nurse who escorted her here takes the chart from her hands and fades into the background. Or maybe she left altogether; Callie can't honestly say she noticed. Other nurses are frantically rushing to fulfill the orders coming from the blond reaching for the paddles, and Callie is having a tough time tearing her eyes away.

Everybody is rushing to help this girl - Nicole Ackler, if she's remembering right - and she's just standing there. At least three nurses and one intern are pushing their way through the small room, and she's just getting in the way. They're working around her, almost if she isn't there, but she can tell that they step around her carefully and those small movements are wasting time. But nobody offers her a second glance or tells her anything.

Then she is snapped back to reality as a nurse bumps into her, and mutters a small, "Sorry, Dr. Torres."

Callie blinks, nods, then pulls a pair of gloves onto her hands. She vaguely notices, somewhere in the back of her mind, that blood is soaking through her shirt - it must have been from where the nurse bumped into her. She steps up to Nicole's body and is about to apply pressure onto a bleeding wound that has been ignored up until now when Arizona shouts "Clear!" and places the paddles on Nicole's chest. Her heartbeat slowly returns to normal and Callie lets out a breath she didn't realize she was holding.

She puts pressure on the wound just like she had intended to do before. A nurse must have noticed because she is soon being handed gauze, and the intern is quickly coming up beside her and offering to stitch it up. She nods numbly, moving out of the way for the intern. She realizes she doesn't even know his name.

She tries her best to assess the damage to the child's right leg, but huffs at herself when she can't feel much through the swelling. "I'll need an x-ray," she says to any nurse who happens to be listening to her. One of them nods at her.

"We need to get her to surgery as soon as possible," another nurses informs her.

"I know," Callie says, and she can feel the slight adrenaline from seeing the patient start to wear off. Her voice is starting to sound tired and the headache is once again becoming prominent. "But I can't do anything until I get an x-ray."

"We'll get her up as soon as possible," the nurse promises. They are ready to move her as soon as Callie steps back, and they simply wait for the intern to finish with the stitches and Arizona gives them permission. Then the intern steps back, Arizona nods, the nurse waves her hand, and they are out the door.

Callie is starting to take her gloves off and throw them in the trash as the one remaining nurse puts her hand on Arizona's shoulder. "You were a_maz_ing, Dr. Robbins," she says, and if the words weren't enough, the tone certainly told Callie that it wasn't an innocent compliment. Callie glances behind her and, sure enough, red hair meets her eyes.

"Thank you," Arizona says kindly. Callie doesn't even have to look back to know the pediatric surgeon is smiling and probably even putting a hand on the nurse's arm.

"So, I was thinking," the nurse continues, "since last night we had _so_ much fun..."

Callie doesn't hear the rest. Tears start to blur her vision despite her every attempt to hold them back. Her head feels like it's ready to explode and she's not sure if it's what she just heard or the hangover but she feels like she's about to throw up all over the clean hospital floor. She stumbles out of the room, one glove falling successfully into the trash can and the other onto the floor. She hears a questioning "Callie?" come from her ex-girlfriend, but it sounds like Arizona's voice is coming from so far away...

_Callie, she called me Callie, _she thinks briefly, _she only calls me Callie when she's mad..._

A strong arm wraps around her, pushing her into the owner's chest and leading her to God-knows-where. They stop for a brief moment and through her sobs she's faintly aware of two familiar voices washing over her, then they start walking and the arm around her tightens. There's the ding of an elevator, they stop, and then they're walking again. The next thing she knows she's laying on an on-call room bed with her head on Mark's lap as he whispers comforting words into her ear and rubs her back.

Minutes pass, and finally Callie pushes herself up. She brings her knees to her chest and leans her head on Mark's shoulder. He's always been there for her; she honestly doesn't know where she would be without him, _what_ she would be without him.

"I just really embarrassed myself out there, didn't I?" she asks softly after a minute, forcing a smile onto her face despite the tears that still leak out of her eyes.

"A little," he answers honestly, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. She sighs.

"Thanks."

He presses a kiss to her temple. They spend a few minutes in silence, each lost in their own thoughts - hers about Arizona, his about her. Then he asks, "You okay?"

She pulls back just enough to be able to look at him and shrugs, willing herself not to cry again. "She was standing there, flirting right in front of me. It was like she didn't even remember."

"Remember?"

"Everything we've been through," she elaborates.

"Oh." It's silent for a moment, then he hesitantly says, "You know Arizona still cares about you, right? Back there, she was trying to make sure you were okay..."

"She broke up with me. I don't think that means she cares, Mark."

"Callie, she only did that because you weren't... You weren't_ you_. You _aren't _you anymore."

"I'm still me," she whispers, "I just... It's hard."

"It's not too late," he offers. "You could still go back, try to fix things..."

"I think I fucked it up pretty bad. She won't want to try."

"You sure about that, Cal?" he asks, and she gets a feeling that he knows something she doesn't.

_"How can you just walk on by  
Without one tear in your eye?  
Don't you have the slightest feelings left for me?  
Maybe that's just your way of dealing with the pain  
Forgetting everything between our rise and fall  
Like we never loved at all."  
_-"Like We Never Loved At All" - _Faith Hill and Tim McGraw_


	3. Silence

Disclaimer: Grey's Anatomy is not mine, and neither is the song.  
Author's Note: Wow, thank you for all the feedback! It's good to know that so many people are enjoying this. This is, as promised, the flashback chapter - posted only hours before the flashback episode, haha. Kinda cutting it close, I know. Anyway, this probably isn't what most of you were expecting to be the cause of the break-up, but hopefully it doesn't disappoint. It doesn't exactly answer everything but, what is left unanswered will - eventually - be told. So, yeah. Enjoy!

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**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 3 : Silence  
**

Callie reluctantly tears her mouth from Arizona's neck as her phone starts to ring. She walks into the living room and digs through her purse, groaning when she can't find it underneath everything else she has in there; she makes a mental note to clean it out later. "I almost burnt dinner!" Arizona calls from behind her in the kitchen, and Callie can hear the grin in her voice. She starts to chuckle but stops as she pulls out her phone and catches a glance at the caller I.D.

"Jose?" she answers. Confusion, hurt, and anger lace her voice.

"Calliope, there was--"

"Don't call me that." The force and anger in her voice is enough to make Arizona look up from the pot.

"Everything okay, babe?" the blond asks, to which Callie nods absentmindedly.

"There was an accident," he continues, seemingly unfazed by her outburst. He sounds softer and kinder than he has in years and she almost wonders if he's changed.

Then she tells herself, _No, I can't think like that._

"An accident?"

"Yes, a car accident. Aria and Damien were hit by--"

"Are they okay?" That's her main concern right now. The how's and the why's can wait. For now she just needs to know they're okay.

"Dammit, Callie, stop interrupting me!"

Callie literally jumps as he screams into her ear. She doesn't miss Arizona's worried glance. But at least now she doesn't have to wonder - he is definitely the same man she has always known him to be.

"Okay," she whispers.

"They were hit by a drunk driver," he continues like nothing happened. "Damien is in a coma..."

"And Aria?"

"She... She didn't make it, Calliope..."

Callie stumbles back until she hits the couch and falls onto it. She's too stunned to tell him not to call her by her full name. She's too stunned to answer Arizona's questions. She's too stunned to say anything to the man on the other end of the phone line. She's too stunned to do anything but move her eye when Arizona picks up the phone and starts to talk to Jose. She's too stunned to tell her not to talk to him. She's too stunned to do anything but cry when Arizona sits down beside her and envelopes her in a hug.

-------

"The funeral," Callie says suddenly, sitting up in the bed. "I've got to go to the funeral."

Arizona looks at her sadly as she takes a seat at the foot of the bed and puts a hand on Callie's leg. "Calliope, that man yesterday on the phone--"

"Jose?"

"Yeah, Jose. He said your parents didn't want you to go..."

Sure, Callie knew they were still upset about her being gay, but seriously? "She's my sister! What am I supposed to do? I can't miss her funeral. I don't even know where she's going to be buried!"

"Do you..." Arizona sighs, looking down at her feet. "Do you know a Brandon?" she asks hesitantly.

Callie's eyes snap right back to Arizona and her muscles tense automatically. "What did you say?" she demands, and Arizona knows that glint in her eyes - it's the same one that's always there when she's trying to protect herself.

"Jose said she will be right beside Brandon?" It's supposed to be a statement and they both know it, but somehow it comes out as a question.

"Of course," Callie mutters, falling back into the bed. All of this is happening all at once and it's almost too much for her to handle. She has to talk to Jose, her big sister is dead and she can't go to the funeral, her parents won't even _speak _to her, Damien is in a coma, Brandon...

There's nothing that can be said to make it any better and Arizona knows this. She wishes she could lay down beside Callie and just hold her, but she can't right now. She presses a light kiss to her girlfriend's temple and reluctantly leaves for work.

-------

Callie sets her bowl in the sink and finds it hard to believe that she was standing in nearly this exact same spot a little under 72 hours ago and was happy. Perfectly, completely happy. Over-the-moon _happy._

It took less than 72 hours for that to be ruined. It took one phone call, a mere five minutes of her life, to shatter everything.

Her phone rings, snapping her out of her thoughts. She goes to answer it as a chill runs through her spine; the last time she answered her cell phone she was told her sister was dead. Shakily, Callie opens the phone without the smallest glance to the caller.

"Hello?"

"Calliope." Jose's voice reaches her ears and already she wants to scream.

"Don't call me that," she reminds him, her voice cold and detached, angry and hateful.

"I just wanted to know how you're holding up." This time she knows the kindness and sympathy in his voice is far from real.

"Fine," she lies.

"I was thinking of flying up to Seattle--"

"Come within a hundred feet of me and I swear to God, Jose..."

"I don't remember you being so mean, Calliope. Didn't I teach you anything?"

"Your daughter just _died!_" she tries. She knows it won't work, it won't change anything, but she'll try it if it has any possibility of keeping him away from her. Callie feels guilty for already using Aria's death to keep him back, but she can't help it.

"I know that." Now he's angry. Callie can tell by the shorter sentences and the way she can hear him practically spitting into the receiver. "Your dad has it under control."

"_My _dad?" she repeats. "He was more of a dad to hear than you _ever_ were."

She doesn't hear the door open and she doesn't notice the three surgeons standing behind her.

"That's only because I spent my time raising _you_. I--"

"You didn't raise me! You did the_ furthest_ thing from raising me!"

"I cared for you, Calliope." Jose's voice is calm again, and she wonders briefly if he's gone back to those anger management classes he was trying out a few years ago. "I saw more in you than they ever did. I knew you would be great. I knew you would make something out of yourself."

"The hell you did."

"Of course I did. That's why I was glad when you decided what you did with Brandon. I knew you wouldn't--"

"You fucking bastard!"

"Excuse me?" The anger is starting to flow back into his voice again and her heartbeat automatically quickens.

"Don't you _dare_ bring him into this! The only reason you were glad about that was because it meant nobody had to find out about you!"

"Now you know that's not true."

"Go to hell," Callie spits into the phone, snapping it closed and throwing it down onto the ground. She stands there for a moment, holding onto the table for dear life as she shakes and cries. Then she gets a handle on herself and turns around to wash the bowl she had rinsed out a few minutes ago.

And there stands Arizona, Owen, and Cristina.

All three stare at her, and she guesses they're trying to take in what they have heard. She isn't sure what all they heard, but no matter how much it was, it isn't good. So she says the only thing she can think of to describe her situation: "Well, _fuck._"

-------

"Calliope?" Arizona calls softly into the darkness. She gave Callie some time since overhearing that phone conversation - it seemed like the best thing to do - but now she really just wants some answers.

Callie pats the empty space beside her on the bed and Arizona can't help but smile. It's been about four days since they found out about Aria's death and since then, this is the first time Callie has made any sort of gesture that lets Arizona know she is wanted. The blond slides under the covers and as soon as she's laying comfortably on her side, Callie has thrown an arm over her waist and is snuggled up against her back. She can feel Callie's head buried in her hair and breathing on her neck and she has to admit, this feels nice. It's a feeling she wishes would never end.

But she knows she has to ask and she knows Callie won't want to answer. All she can do is hope her girlfriend doesn't completely shut down.

"I'm confused, Calliope," Arizona cautiously admits. She feels Callie move, resting her head on the palm of her hand and moving her arm off Arizona's waist to the empty space in front of the blond's stomach. In turn, Callie's body is now pressed closer to Arizona's back. It's something she almost didn't think was possible, but she's very glad that it was.

"About what?" Callie asks softly, glad that Arizona can't see her flinch. She knows what this is going to be about, or at least she has a pretty good idea, and she already doesn't like it.

"Who exactly _is _Jose?"

Callie tenses against Arizona's back and scoots back some. Arizona frowns, disappointed, but waits patiently all the same.

"Aria's dad," Callie finally says.

"I thought Carlos was her dad?"

"No. Mom and Daddy got married right after Aria turned five."

"What about Jose?"

"He, uh, never married. He stayed a part of her - our - lives, though. They, uhm, worked everything out."

Arizona doesn't want to have to push but she knows she'll have to. She sighs, then hesitantly says, "I - we - overheard you on the phone, and you said... Well, you said that he did the furthest thing from raising you?"

She hears Callie draw in a deep, shaky breath. "Yeah," is all she says. Arizona furrows her eyebrows in confusion. Is that it?

Callie slides out of bed. "Where are you going?" Arizona asks as Callie opens a dresser drawer. Her heart starts to beat in her ears as fear rises in her that Callie's going to leave. She has no reason to feel that way, Callie's never left before, but for some reason the feeling still creeps up on her.

"I'm just going to take a shower," Callie answers in a near-whisper, holding up the pajamas she just finished pulling out. She took a shower just a few hours ago and she knows Arizona is about to mention that, so she simply says, "I feel dirty." And she does.

Very, very dirty.

-------

Arizona is so excited for Callie when she sees the name "Daddy" flash across the screen of her girlfriend's cell phone that she answers the call herself. She is in the process of saying, "Hold on and I'll get Calliope, she's in the shower" when Carlos Torres starts yelling in her ear.

Out of the mixture of Spanish and English, the only sentence she can honestly say she understood is "Jose says he knows who Brandon's father is!"

To which Arizona says, "Isn't Damien his father?"

"Who the hell is this?" Carlos demands, just as Callie steps out of the bathroom and notices Arizona has her phone up to her ear.

A simple explanation and a small apology later, Callie is holding the phone to her ear while her father continues to yell. Arizona looks like she's about to cry, at least until Callie lightly kisses her temple.

-------

"So... Who _is _Brandon's father?" Arizona asks as they find themselves in the same position they were in when she asked questions the last time.

Callie tenses behind her once again but this time she doesn't answer or move away. She hadn't thought about that. Of course Arizona thought Damien was his dad. Most people did. Damien and Aria raised him, after all. Brandon was _their _son. She was Aunt Callie, and that was where the relationship had ended.

"Calliope?"

Callie sighs into Arizona's hair. "You don't want to know," she says, but in a way that lets Arizona know the rest of the sentence - _'and I'm not going to tell you.'_

"But, Calliope--" she tries, carefully intertwining her fingers with the ones on the hand Callie has draped over her waist.

"Goodnight, Arizona," Callie says firmly. She feels Arizona's body relax in defeat and tightens her hold on the blond's hand as it starts to slip out of hers, bringing a small smile to Arizona's face in the process.

-------

The more detailed and personal Arizona's questions become, the less willing Callie is to answer them. She always has some way to deflect or change the subject, and if she can't do that, she simply refuses to say anything at all. The more it happens, the more worried Arizona becomes; Callie is becoming paranoid and guarded and even though neither of them like it, there's very little either of them can do.

They spend the small amounts of time they have together in silence, unless Arizona can manage to find something Callie is willing to talk about. Even those conversations don't last long, though, because as soon as it gets too close for comfort Callie shuts down and the conversation turns to pure silence.

Arizona is willing to wait. She has heard about the times Callie has had her breakdowns in the past and, based on those stories, she assumes this is the part before the storm. She waits for the tears and the pain. From what she can tell, they are supposed to be coming next.

She doesn't expect Callie to yell at her.

All she says is, "Why won't you talk to me, Calliope?"

And Callie yells, "What the hell do you want me to say, Arizona? I've already told you everything I can! You know enough, why can't you live with that?"

"'Everything you can'?" Arizona quotes. "What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing! It doesn't mean a damn thing! I already told you everything you need to know."

Arizona wants to ask, "then who's Brandon's father?" or "so why do you hate Jose so much?" but she decides better of it. Most people wouldn't be able to tell, but she knows Callie is close to tears. The only question left for that is why and Callie storms out of the apartment before she can find out.

-------

"Three days," she says for at least the third time in five minutes. Derek nods as he signs the piece of paper, and for the first time Callie is glad he's the new chief. Richard wouldn't have even considered giving her time off, but here Derek was, giving it to her without a second thought.

"I hope you get everything worked out," he says softly, and for a moment, Callie's mad. Can't Arizona keep anything to herself?

But even so, she thanks him as she steps out of his office and tells herself not to be mad. If the situation was reversed, she probably would have told someone, too. And how did she even know it was Arizona? It could have been Owen, Cristina, Mark, or some long "he said that she said that he said that she said" thing.

She sighs. The important thing now is _telling _Arizona. After all, she's going to Florida for three days.

-------

It doesn't go over well. Callie tries to tell her quickly, nonchalantly, casually, almost in passing, but Arizona picks up on it instantly. It turns into a full-blown fight in the middle of the cafeteria, with both of them screaming and shouting at the top of their lungs until Arizona gets an emergency page. Callie retreats to the on-call room to gather her thoughts, but ends up crying herself to sleep on the cold, hard mattress.

Arizona walks in at one point, sees Callie lying there, and walks out.

That's when she realizes just how badly she fucked everything up these past few months.

-------

Arizona waited for Callie to get back. Sure, she hadn't been happy about her girlfriend waiting until the day before she left to tell her and the fight hadn't been pretty, but she isn't going to give up that easily. She loves Callie.

But the brunette walks in the door looking more tired and broken than she did when she left. Arizona can almost swear she sees a nasty bruise poking out over the collar of Callie's shirt. She wants to look at it closer but when Callie gets to her, she gets a small peck on the cheek and then Callie disappears into her room.

-------

They have another fight a few weeks after Callie returns, this time in the hospital's lobby.

Callie holds onto her bag for dear life as Arizona screams at her from the doorway. "Fine, dammit! Do everything by yourself. I don't fucking care anymore, Callie!" And then she disappears into the rainy night.

With everybody watching her, wide-eyed, Callie turns and makes her way to that on-call room she's grown to love so much.

When she gets home in the morning, all the little things that mean so much to Arizona are gone. The bracelet that she left on the coffee table, her cell phone charger by Callie's bed, her extra scrub cap, her favorite magazine, her box of band-aids, the extra wheels for her Heely's... It's all gone.

Callie takes out her phone and has the number dialed when Cristina looks up from her breakfast and says in a voice Callie almost thinks is Cristina's version of sympathetic, "Blondie said not to bother trying to talk to her."

She nods numbly. Cristina watches her for a few moments more, and it's just after she returns her gaze to her cereal that Callie throws the phone against the wall. The pieces fall to the floor, and Cristina watches with her mouth half-open as Callie simply turns and walks to her bedroom.

"I'll clean it later," she says, barely loud enough for her roommate to hear, before slamming the door.

Callie slides to the floor, reminding herself so much of the pieces of her phone she watched just moments before. Tears start to leak out of her eyes and she holds back a sob. This is a feeling she should be used to by now. This is a feeling that should be her best friend by now. This is a feeling that shouldn't hurt her anymore. She shouldn't be effected by this anymore. But here she is, once again.

She is alone.

_"What do I do now that you're gone?  
No back-up plan, no second chance, and no one else to blame  
All I can hear in the silence that remains  
Are the words I couldn't say."  
- "_Words I Couldn't Say_," Rascal Flatts_


	4. Lost Control

Disclaimer: Grey's isn't mine, nor is "Chocolate" by Snow Patrol... If anything in this story could be considered "mine," it would be Jose. And I don't want him.  
A/N: Again, thanks to everyone for their feedback! And geez, were you watching the same Grey's I was on Thursday night? Callie's public speaking fear was hilarious, haha, but it definitely seemed like something I would do... Now I'm just waiting for some serious Callie-Arizona talk. There has to be _something _after Callie offered to raise Sloan's baby, and then did you see the look Arizona gave Alex? Or then the one Callie gave him? I don't mind her having slept with him 'cause it was about... What, four years ago? Something like that? But I'll be PO'ed if he gets in the way of Calzona... Though I have been looking forward to some sort of drama with them (what can I say, I love me some drama). Okay, wow, I'm rambling. Haha. Anyways, enjoy, and let me know what you think!

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 4 : Lost Control**

There's a knock on the door just as Callie's pager goes off. She had fallen asleep on Mark's lap, and he had just sat back against the wall and fallen asleep himself. Luckily for him, he got to sleep for a little while longer. The pager hadn't managed to wake him up.

An intern is waiting for her outside, and when she nearly runs him over, he lets out a small scream. She shoots him a look but doesn't stop, instead running towards the x-rays she needs to look at so she can operate. They're prepping Nicole for surgery now, and she needs to be able to see what she needs to do. She has to help this kid walk again.

"Dr. Torres?" the intern shouts after her. There is fear and intimidation in his voice and she wonders if maybe he is new. Or maybe he's truly scared of her. Is she really that scary?

"What?" she asks, stopping and turning around. She can't keep the annoyance and impatience out of her voice. She's only glad that her headache has subsided. Maybe that nap was just what she needed.

"There's someone here to see you," he says, jogging towards her. She hasn't moved an inch.

"Who?"

"Jose?" The intern shifts from one foot to the other uncomfortably. Callie's eyes darken and she shakes her head.

"I have a surgery to get to," she snaps. "The next time you want to put a child's life on hold, make sure it's worth it." She glares at the young man and then makes her way down the hallway, muttering to herself in Spanish along the way. She notices the intern hasn't moved an inch since she snapped at him. Hmm. Maybe she _is _that scary.

Arizona is about to finish scrubbing in when Callie finally makes it down there after examining the x-rays. Once again she had forgotten she had to work this case with Arizona. The blond tries to catch her gaze but Callie won't - _can't _- look at her. She can't look at Arizona even though the one thing she wants the most right now is to have her arms around her. But she can't look and see everything she ruined, everything she destroyed, all the mistakes she made, all the good things she got scared of and pushed away. She can't look and see the memories of that redhead flash through her head again. That cannot be the thing that pops into her mind when she looks at Arizona.

So she focuses on washing her hands and putting on her scrub cap. If she can focus on this small task, maybe she will be able to make it through the surgery. Because that is the most important thing. That girl's life is what is important. If she can't even scrub in, how is she going to be able to save that kid?

Callie steps through the sliding doors moments after Arizona and takes her place by Nicole. She calls for the scalpel and sighs contentedly as she holds onto it. This is what she loves about surgery; her whole life is falling apart around her and yet, standing here, she has control. She is the one who will cut the flesh, she is the one who will repair the bone. She might save a life.

Then she blinks and she realizes that even in this OR, she doesn't have control. This is a PEDs case and Arizona has ultimate control over what goes on in here. And that's not all. One wrong move and this child _dies._ Anything can happen. Things that she can't control could happen.

Her hand starts to shake as her mind goes back to Jose, sitting in the lobby waiting for her around all of her friends, around all of the people she knows...

Apparently she isn't the only one who notices she is shaking and not doing anything else. "Dr. Torres, are you alright?" a nurse behind her asks carefully.

"I.." Callie swallows, shutting her eyes for a brief second. She hates to admit defeat but she doesn't see any other options here. "Page another orthopedic surgeon."

"You're the only one," the nurse says, and there's some sort of fear and regret and worry in her voice.

"We don't have a resident?"

"No, just you."

_Shit, _she thinks. _We have to merge with Mercy West and we don't even get another damn orthopedic surgeon? _She glances around the room and then her eyes rest on Arizona. They are the only two surgeons in the room; there are no other residents or interns and Callie thinks that was a stupid decision, but it's how it turned out all the same. "Dr. Robbins," she says, trying to keep her voice as professional as possible, "could you make the first cut, please?" She feels pathetic and incapable by asking but it's the only option if she wants to help Nicole walk again.

Arizona gives her a worried glance but nods and moves over to where Callie is. Callie steps back to give her room and hands her the scalpel. Arizona makes the cut easily, like it is the most natural thing in the world, and it just makes Callie feel even more like a failure. But she forces a smile onto her face. "Thank you," she whispers, moving up as Arizona steps away.

She is starting to pin together two pieces of the comminuted fracture when the door bursts open. Callie turns around on her heel as soon as it is safe to and finds herself looking at the same intern who stopped her in the hallway.

"Dr. Torres, he told..." He has to stop to catch his breath and it is while he is leaning over that Callie notices his busted lip and the bruise forming around his eye. "He said he needs to speak with you _now_."

"Who's with him?" Callie demands, suddenly worried.

"Dr. Sloan was holding him back when I left."

"Dr. Robbins, do you think you could--"

"I can keep her stable for a while with no action. We'll need you back soon, though." Arizona sighs. "Go deal with your problems."

Callie nods, knowing just how unprofessional this is, then rushes out of the room. She can't believe Jose would punch that intern. She can't believe that he would do it so publicly that _Mark _would see and have to hold him back. He was never open about any of that. He was always _so_ _good_ in public.

She reaches the waiting room and as soon as Jose sees her, he pulls himself out of Mark's grasp. Mark stands and is about to try to grab him again when Callie shakes her head. She tears her gaze away from Jose to meet her best friend's eyes and tells him, "I've got this."

Mark nods and backs up, almost like he doesn't believe her, before leaving the room reluctantly. "Page me if you need anything," he says before the door closes.

"Your father knows," Jose says as soon as the door shuts behind Mark and they're alone. Really, no other families have to wait today? She holds back a groan. "How the hell would your father know, Callie?"

At first she's glad that he called her Callie without her having to correct him, but then his words sink in along with the way he punched the intern and the glint of fury in his eyes. "What does he know?" she asks, fearing the answer. Her voice shakes though she's trying to remain calm, tough, badass...

"He knows who Brandon's father is," he says through clenched teeth, "which means he knows _everything."_

Her breath catches in her throat. _No, no, no, no, no... _She knew her dad would find out eventually, she thinks, she thinks she knew he would - sometimes she wished he would, wished that he would walk in, or something, but now that he knows her heart feels like it's about to burst right through her chest because it's beating so hard...

Jose grabs her arm, doing his best to make it look friendly and she looks into his furious eyes. His hand is getting tighter and tighter as the seconds tick by.

"I thought you knew better than to tell anyone!"

"I didn't tell," she says, and her voice again betrays her emotions. She's about to cry and she knows he can tell.

"Where can we be alone?"

Reluctantly, Callie leads him to the on-call room. "I swear, I didn't tell," she says again as she shuts the door behind them.

"So how the hell did he find out, huh?" Jose's hand grasps her shoulder and squeezes. "Who _did _you tell?"

"I swear to God, Jose, I didn't--"

"Stop telling me that bullshit!" His open palm comes into contact with her cheek. If it had been anyone else she would have done her best to retaliate. But with him, she is too far afraid to even consider it. He is only a few years younger than her own dad and she thinks she could take him, but she doesn't have the guts to fight back right now.

Callie bites her lip to keep the tears from falling. Blood seeps into her mouth but she won't give him the satisfaction of knowing he can make her cry so easily.

"Dammit, Callie, I did all I could for you..."

"You didn't do a damn thing for me!" she argues, but the words are not nearly as strong as she needs them to be.

"I convinced Aria to take Brandon, didn't I?"

"If she hadn't you would have made sure he died anyway," Callie snarls.

Jose shoves her against the wall and this time she can't keep the tears from falling. His forearm is pressed into her neck and his other hand is shoving into her stomach and it keeps getting harder for her to take in air, all she needs to do is just breathe breathe_ breathe_ but she can't, she can't get the air to go in...

"He ended up dead anyway, didn't he?" Jose whispers into her ear. Then he pulls back and lets her go, watching her slide to the floor with satisfaction written all over his face. "I probably should have killed the kid while he was still in you," he muses, and though he's sending her an amused smirk there is hatred in his eyes. "None of this would be happening then, would it?" He gives her a sharp kick to the side and she gasps before groaning in pain.

"Jose..."

"Shut up," he growls, pulling her to her feet.

"No," Callie says forcefully. "You don't get to do this anymore, I'm not that little kid anymore--"

He shoves her again and this time her head barely connects with the sharp metal of the on-call bed. It cuts into her temple and as blood starts to fall down the side of her face, she falls to the ground. She can't think fast enough to try to catch herself and Jose doesn't bother.

She presses a hand to her cut and swears. She tries to pull herself to her feet but the room is starting to spin around her. She's not sure if it's because of the cut or the hangover, or maybe a little bit of both.

Her pager starts to go off and Jose shakes his head as he pulls her up roughly. Callie knows it hasn't been too long yet, so she knows somebody must have said something to Arizona. "You're supposed to be a _surgeon _but you can't even take care of yourself." He scoffs at her and walks away, slamming the door behind him. Callie leaves after him, but once she's out in the hallway he has already disappeared. A nurse sees her and helps with the gash, and then she's on her way back to Nicole's surgery. Arizona and that little girl need her right now, and like Jose said, she's supposed to be a surgeon.

This is her job. Her stomach and her neck and her side still hurt, and more than that she has a headache and a throbbing cut on her temple, but Nicole has a shattered bone and a variety of other injuries from that car crash. Callie won't begin to walk away from that girl just because of a few minor setbacks in her personal life. She's supposed to be a surgeon.

Callie steps into the OR vaguely aware that the bandage she rushed the nurse on is poking out of her scrub cap by a few centimeters. But thankfully nobody seems to notice. Everybody is focused on Nicole's leg.

She makes her presence known and Arizona steps back, again giving her access to the bone she needs to fix. She's being handed the drill when Arizona asks, "What happened to your forehead?" and Callie realizes there's no way it would have gone unnoticed.

She shrugs, turning the drill on and pressing it to the bone. It gives her time to think. "I slipped," she says simply. The oldest, most transparent lie in the book.

"Mark came by and said to page you early," Arizona says, and Callie nods.

"Thank you." _You don't know how much I needed that._

"Who was here to see you?"

She reaches the point she needed to and switches the drill off, then looks up at Arizona. "I can't do this," she says, willing her voice not to shake anymore than it already is. "I can't do the whole friends thing okay? I can barely do the working-with-you thing." And then she breaks their eye contact and looks back down, turning the drill back on.

"I'm sorry," Arizona whispers. The care and concern in her voice is nearly enough to have Callie in tears.

She wants to tell her. She wants to say all those things she should have said months ago. She wants Arizona to know all the things she should have told somebody, _any_body, years ago. She almost wants Arizona to be able to guess, or to put her in a corner and_ force_ her to tell. But Callie doesn't want to know what Jose would do to her or even Arizona if she found out. She doesn't want to see the look she knows Arizona's face will switch to or the pity that will be in her eyes. She doesn't want to see the disgust, or the shock. She knows they would all look at her differently and she doesn't want that.

So all Callie says is, "Me too."

_"Goodness knows I saw it coming  
Or at least I'll claim I did  
But in truth I'm lost for words  
What have I done? It's too late for that  
What have I become? Truth is nothing yet"  
"_Chocolate_" - Snow Patrol_


	5. One Step Closer

Disclaimer: Still ain't mine, folks.  
A/N: Here we go, chapter five! Hopefully it's up to par. Enjoy, and as always, a giant thank-you to everyone who reviews, alerts, favorites, and just plain reads this! (:

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 5 : One Step Closer**

As she steps up to the sink, Callie tears the surgical mask off her face. The doors slide open behind her and Arizona steps into the small room. Callie closes her eyes tightly and tries to focus on her breathing. She can't believe that little girl just died on her table and she couldn't bring her back, she couldn't get her to breathe again, couldn't get her heart to beat...

"You did everything you could," Arizona says softly, almost as if she heard Callie's thoughts, and turns the water on to wash her hands.

There is no way to count how many times Callie has been told those exact same words. It's the same thing everyone always says when a patient is lost, and sometimes, it's true. When it's true, it barely helps; it helps a little, but not enough to make much of difference. When it isn't true, it just makes it worse. This time, Callie knows it is far from the truth. Because if she had done all she could then she would have made that first cut. She wouldn't have walked out during the surgery. She wouldn't have been distracted by her headache or the (_beautiful, amazing, breathtaking...) _blond across the table. No, she did not do all she could.

She wants to tell Arizona that but she can't. She can't go back to that. She can't give herself false hope. She shouldn't pretend that the other woman still cares because she heard the truth herself, the truth that no, she _doesn't fucking care anymore._

Callie hears Arizona turn her water off and notices that she never even turned hers on. The blood still stains the gloves she forgot to take off and she's faintly aware of a few spots of blood just above the area her scrub mask covered.

"Calliope?"

She almost forgot how her full name sounded coming out of Arizona's mouth. She knew there was a reason she never minded when Arizona called her that. Hearing it now, after going so long without hearing it, and feeling it wash over her, Callie remembers why. There's a softness, a kindness, a tenderness, underlying her name when Arizona says it. Even before they dated, even when she was being called a "newborn," even when they were fighting about George, that tone was there. When she said "Callie" it sounded harsher. It was still beautiful, heart-stopping, and enough to make her stomach do back flips, but it was harsher and stronger. Instead of the tenderness and softness it was forceful and rough, either needy (_"damn it, Callie, I need you _now!_"_) or angry (_"deal with your own damn problems, Callie")_.

Callie tears her eyes from the sink as Arizona calls her name again. She would stare at that sink for hours if it meant the blond would keep saying her name, if it meant that she would look at her, if it meant she would _care_. But that was just her imagination getting the best of her.

"You did all you could," Arizona repeats, nodding her head ever-so-slightly. Callie notices that she does that every time she tries to convince someone of something.

_She did it when we talked in that elevator ("_you're not hearing me, Calliope_"_)_. She did it when she told me she loved me ("_I do_")._

"There was no way to save her," she continues.

Except there was, if her mind had been in the game. If she had been focused. If she had kept her priorities straight. If she could figure out how to separate her work life from her personal life. If she had listened to Mark and stayed away from the alcohol, even if it _was _supposed to be her day off. If she could learn something from her previous experiences.

Callie blinks. That's what she had tried to convince Arizona of, wasn't it? That she had experience? That maybe she hasn't always known she is gay or bi or whatever the hell she is but she still has _experience. _She has seen things and heard things and done things and known things and been things and gone places...

Why had she tried so hard to make that point? She may have the experience but she didn't learn anything from it. There are so many lessons she could have learned from George and Mark and Erica and hell, even Sadie, and definitely from Jose and her parents and Aria and Brandon. There were so many lessons she could have learned from being in the peace corps and being a surgeon and being wealthy. But she hasn't learned a damn thing, or if she has, she sure as hell hasn't used it to her advantage. She keeps making the same mistakes and she knows it but she doesn't do anything about it. She makes them before she knows she makes them, sure, but shouldn't she recognize the signs already? Shouldn't she be able to tell when she's about to fuck everything up? Because by the time she's realized it, she's already broken and everything _around _her is already broken.

"I... I can't," Callie whispers when Arizona lays a comforting hand on her arm. She tries to focus on her tennis shoes - her _brand new_ tennis shoes, at that - but as she does, she lets out a "Dammit!" that's just a little bit louder than her normal voice.

Shocked, Arizona takes a step back. "I'm sorry," she says quietly, and there's more meaning behind her words than just one and Callie hears them all.

"Not you," Callie says, instantly feeling guilty. She wishes this wasn't so awkward. She wishes this didn't hurt so much. But she's the one who screwed it up, so she doesn't have the right to think like that. "It's just... Even my shoes have blood." But the more she looks at it the more she isn't sure if the blood is hers or Nicole's or a little bit of both. She assumes the latter; there's no way she didn't get any on her shoes in the on-call room with Jose and there's no way she didn't get any blood on them while she was operating. Not with all that blood spurting out everywhere....

"She was nine years old," Callie says into the silence that has fallen over them. Arizona watches her silently; the brunette isn't even looking at her. "She had her whole life ahead of her. She was in, what, third grade? Fourth? She should be at school right now, complaining about the teachers and trading her sandwich for a pack of cookies and running from boys because they have cooties. Or hell, making out with boys because do they still have cooties in third grade? She should be looking forward to high school and college and pretending to throw a wedding. Or learning how to dribble a basketball, or watching tv, or going to birthday parties, or... I don't know. But she should be _living, _dammit! She should be laughing and having fun. She was barely even old enough to understand what death is!"

"Calliope..." Arizona finally tries, again placing her hand on Callie's arm and squeezing gently. "It happens."

"It shouldn't have. She had parents who love her and a good home and did you see all of her family? There are more people here for her than there was for George's dad! You weren't here then, were you? God, there were a lot of people here for him," she rambles. "But she died. He died, too - George's dad. She had her whole life ahead of her, Arizona."

Tears are starting to form in her eyes, and she feels like she's about to break. All of these patients she's treated over the past few weeks that she has pretended not to care about, all of these patients she simply _treated_, are popping into her head. She wants to talk - she thinks better when she talks - but the sobs are forming in her throat and she can't get any of the words out.

Arizona pulls her into a hug as the sobs escape her. Callie leans into it for a moment, holding on to the blond's scrubs for dear life as the tears pour out of her eyes like a fountain.

Then she pulls away, suddenly and forcefully, sniffling and scrubbing out. She rubs her eyes and draws in a ragged breath. "I'm sorry," she apologizes. "I'll... I'll go tell the family."

Arizona watches on with a sad expression as Callie rushes to the door and it slams behind her.

Callie walks down the hallway on her mission to tell the family, to get it over with, like she has a million times before. There are no longer tears in her eyes and she's forcing herself to walk tall, with her head up and shoulders back. Like she's ready to face the world. Like she did when she first arrived at Seattle Grace.

Then she stops dead in her tracks and that whole "ready to face the world" act shatters as Jose rounds the corner and starts walking towards her. Callie can't help it as her heart starts beating faster and her shoulders slump slightly of their own accord. He looks at her and smirks, stopping right in front of her.

"How did the surgery go?" he asks, and to an outsider it would sound like a normal, curious, caring question. But Callie can hear the underlying anger and distaste and mockery in his tone.

His eyes bear into hers and she wants to shy away, or look at the floor, or push right past him and go tell Nicole's parents - she notices that she would rather inform two parents and a large crowd of family and friends that a nine-year-old just passed away in her OR than deal with her own issues, and she wonders briefly what this man has made her become - but she can't. She recognizes that glint in his eyes and that twisted smirk on his lips and the brown leather barely sticking out from behind his belt. These things prevent her from leaving. They are enough to keep her frozen in place.

This man is the reason Callie strives to be as much of a badass as she does. He is the reason she tried to make herself strong. He is the reason she learned to stand up to people. He is the reason she figured out how to step up and go after what she wanted.

Yet she can't even _pretend_ to be a badass around him. He makes her feel like a scared, abused puppy. She stands in front of him feeling weaker than she has since before college. She looks him in the eye but she can't stand up to him. She wants nothing more than to just walk away but she can't take a single step.

He made Callie strong because she doesn't want to feel as weak around anyone else as she does around him.

He made her strive to be strong because he made her so damn _weak._

Everything happened so many years ago and she thought she was over it, yet Jose still has this power over her and she feels like she failed. She is practically shaking right now and all he is doing is standing in front of her. All of those attempts to be strong, and for what? So he could show up and completely destroy her? Shave off those few inches that George and Erica had left untouched? No, she isn't going to let him do that.

"She died," Callie answers, straightening her back. She lifts her head up again. He is not going to win this time.

Jose scoffs. "And you pride yourself on being a surgeon."

She swallows. No, sometimes she doesn't. But what is she supposed to say to that?

He yells something at her in Spanish but she's staring blankly at the wall behind him and the words don't quite reach her ears. He says something else in Spanish, then English, then Spanish again. She doesn't even bother moving her gaze to look at him. She won't give him the satisfaction.

Then he slaps her and Callie lets out a surprised gasp. His other hand comes down on her shoulder and he squeezes. "Listen to me when I'm talking to you," he snarls. His hand keeps tightening on her shoulder and she manages a nod. Then some sort of recognition flashes in his brown eyes as he moves his gaze from her face.

"I was going to go tell the family," she says softly as his grip relaxes.

"I'll find you later." The surprise in his eyes is replaced by the hard gaze she is used to. Jose turns around and walks away, leaving Callie to take in a ragged breath as she leans against the wall for support.

"Calliope?" Arizona calls gently from behind her.

Callie stiffens before forcing a smile to her face and turning around. "Hey," she says lamely. She knows Arizona probably saw and even if she didn't, her facade is an easy one to see through right now.

"Is this what you've been hiding?" The blond almost sounds hesitant, as if she isn't sure she is allowed to ask. Or maybe she's just not sure she wants to know.

"I haven't been hiding anything, Arizona."

"I just saw--"

Callie's brown eyes darken. "You didn't see anything," she corrects. Her voice is firm but at the same time it is also desperate and pleading. "You don't know anything, and he doesn't know anything about this." She moves her hands between the both of them, signifying 'this'.

"You don't have to hide it anymo--"

"I've got to go tell the family," Callie reminds her, quickly turning around and walking away, leaving Arizona standing alone in the hallway.

She runs a hand through her dark brown hair and sighs. This isn't good. If Jose finds out that Arizona knows... Well, she doesn't even want to know what would happen. She doubts he would do anything to Arizona, but she knows he wouldn't hesitate to do anything to her. He's gotten careless. He doesn't use the same secrecy he used to. He isn't bothering with the lies. Maybe it's because he is older, and she is older. Maybe he just doesn't care that much anymore. Either way, Callie knows it means there will be more trouble in the long run.

Everybody's going to find out soon. It's not much of a secret anymore.

_"I just need this to be all right  
I can't feel this another night  
I can't take this I come unglued  
I might breakdown in front of you"_  
_"_Pressure_" - Staind_


	6. Stay

Disclaimer: Not mine, sorry.  
A/N: This one is from Arizona's point of view - a nice little change, I thought. But anyway - thank you to everyone who reviewed! I love hearing your thoughts on the story and what's going on in your head. More answers will be coming your way soon, and this chapter may very well make some of you Calzona fans feel a little bit better. (:

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 6 : Stay**

"Exhaustion" is a term every surgeon quickly becomes familiar with by simply working. Arizona is no exception. She has been exhausted before, sure, but in all her years as a doctor, she can't remember a time when she felt quite this tired. She's still standing but her eyelids keep drooping and her head keeps lolling to the side slightly, as if it's too heavy for her neck and shoulders to support. She's sure she looks like one of those cartoons her younger patients love so much.

"Loneliness" is a term everyone who has suffered through a bad break-up is familiar with. Arizona is no exception to this, either. The redhead catches her attention out of the corner of her eye with a big wave and even bigger smile, but Arizona can't manage to do anything to let the nurse, Amber, know she has been acknowledged. Callie must think there is something going on between her and Amber - which, Arizona remembers with a sigh, there technically is. But it's nothing real, nothing serious. It was a result of the loneliness and nothing more.

Arizona can't picture herself having a relationship with Amber. From the looks of it, the redhead doesn't feel the same way, but to Arizona it was just sex. And hell, it wasn't even that great. She briefly wonders why, though - was Amber just not good at it, or was she just not as good as Calliope?

She misses Callie more than anything. They may not be together anymore but there is nothing Arizona would not do for the brunette. There would be nothing stopping her from going right back to Callie if she ever got the chance.

As far as she can tell, though, that chance won't be coming any time soon. At least if Callie running away and not even accepting a hug is any sort of indicator. No, she knows Callie is just hurting. She knows Callie is trying to protect herself.

Arizona rubs a hand over her eyes. How did everything get so messed up? Sure, Callie had been cut off and distant and sometimes even mean, but she knows why now. Everyone knows Callie wears her heart on her sleeve; those emotions she has been showing the past few months must have been the only way she knew of to keep herself from telling, from breaking down in front of everybody.

Now Arizona feels bad. She feels like she should have tried harder, dug deeper, pushed further, and stuck around a little while longer. The logical, rational side of her keeps telling her there was no way she could have known and so she shouldn't feel guilty about it, but at the same time, she had known - _felt _- that there was something seriously wrong. So why hadn't she stayed? She loves Calliope. What was it that pushed her to leave, especially the way she did, in front of the whole hospital?

She nearly curses out loud when she realizes that she probably played right into Callie's fears. Just like the fact that she wears her heart on her sleeve, common knowledge is that Callie has issues. Everyone assumes they stemmed from George and were reinforced by Erica. Arizona isn't sure what she thinks anymore; she used to think that, on top of trust issues, Callie had commitment issues. Is it really abandonment? After all, from what she's been told, Arizona knows Callie jumped right into a commitment with George. He still ended up leaving. So maybe _that_ was why she was so hesitant with Erica. Maybe _that_ was why she tried to hold back, still sleep with Mark, not jump in. Maybe she thought that she was too "all-in" with George and so she should go slower with Erica. She gave Erica space and still ended up hurt.

But they, Callie and Arizona, were going at a good pace. Not too fast, not too slow. They were on the same page. Arizona was happy, and until the news came about Aria, she could tell Callie was happy too. They were good for each other. But then, Callie still ended up getting hurt. Arizona hurt her. Sure, Arizona got hurt too, but she knows that she isn't the one with the issues. Callie is.

How is she supposed to fix this? God knows she wants to. She sighs as she pushes open the door to the on-call room. Maybe she'll be able to think more clearly after a much-needed nap.

Arizona stops in the doorway as she notices a familiar figure sitting on the edge of the mattress. Callie's elbows are on her knees and her head is resting on her palms. From what Arizona can tell, she's just staring at the wall.

Quietly, Arizona steps into the room and shuts the door behind her. Callie's gaze slips from the wall to Arizona's form without moving her head, and the slight movement of her eyes is the only thing that tells Arizona her presence has been acknowledged. She sits down beside the other woman, just noticing the dark spot staining the blue scrubs.

"Is that blood?" she asks softly. It could easily be that Callie lost another patient in the past three hours, but Arizona doesn't remember seeing her name on the board. Callie nods, so Arizona asks, "What happened?"

Arizona watches silently as Callie struggles over the words. "I..." Callie swallows, and Arizona waits patiently. "He thinks... He says I'm more beautiful when I'm hurt." Her voice is empty, devoid of all emotion except for the slight crack that tells Arizona her ex-girlfriend is holding back tears.

Anger surges through Arizona and, even though she isn't usually a violent person, she wants nothing more than to punch that man's face in. Who the hell is he to tell her that? Sure, Callie looks beautiful when she's hurt - Arizona always thinks Callie is beautiful, she has never seen her as anything but - but what kind of sick, twisted bastard _wants_ to see someone hurt? Especially someone as kind and loving as Callie, as _her_ Calliope!

The smell of blood again reaches her nose and Arizona pushes away the anger for the time being. Callie is still bleeding, slowly but surely, and that needs to be her main concern right now. Arizona lightly puts her hand on Callie's arm. Her heart breaks when the brunette flinches at the contact, but is grateful when she doesn't move away. "Can I look at it?" she asks softly.

It takes a minute but Callie finally nods. Arizona carefully lifts the bottom of Callie's scrub top until the cut on her stomach comes into view and she gasps. Callie turns her head to look at her. "It's not as bad as it looks," she whispers. Arizona looks into her eyes but can't tell if the pain she sees there is physical or emotional.

"Can I take care of it?" Arizona has never seen Callie this broken. This is not how Callie, Calliope, is supposed to be.

"Y-Yeah."

Arizona is up and out the door as soon as those words pass through Callie's lips. Callie watches her go warily, not sure if she expects the blond to return or not - she wouldn't be surprised if Arizona just didn't come back. But sure enough, she returns in a matter of minutes, supplies in her arms.

Callie straightens her back and moves her arms so Arizona can have better access to the wound. The cut is shallow, not quite deep enough to require the help of stitches, but it is still enough to have tears springing into the pediatric surgeon's eyes. She carefully cleans the laceration and the area around it, noticing that it was even longer than she thought it was - it goes nearly across the whole width of Callie's stomach. She places the bandage over the cut and sighs.

"Thanks," Callie says softly.

"That's not all," Arizona says, grabbing the scrub top she brought with her and holding it out to the brunette. "It's clean."

Callie looks at it, then takes it from the blond's hands and nods. She slowly changes out of her bloody top into the clean one, and Arizona notices more scratches and bruises that line the brunette's torso. None are quite as bad as the one she just tended to, but it still isn't a pretty sight.

"You didn't have to do all of this," Callie says quietly, snapping Arizona out of her thoughts.

Arizona just gives her a small smile and starts to rub her back. "Do you need anything else? I can get anything you need..." she offers. Callie shakes her head. Then everything happens so fast that, for a moment, Arizona isn't sure what's going on. Tears start to pour out of Callie's eyes and then the orthopedic surgeon's head is buried in her shoulder. It is not what she expected and it isn't under the best of circumstances, but Arizona can't deny that this somehow feels _right_ to her. Like she should always be the one Callie leans on. She presses a kiss into Callie's hair and continues to rub patterns on her back while Callie sobs.

Arizona isn't sure how much time has passed when Callie pulls away and starts to apologize. "I shouldn't... I didn't mean..." Callie sighs. "I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize, Calliope."

She can see the battle raging in Callie's eyes. "You don't... You don't have to pretend. It's okay."

Arizona furrows her eyebrows in confusion. "Pretend?"

"To care. I'm fine."

As it dawns on her what Callie means, Arizona pulls the brunette closer to her, tears pricking at her own eyes. "I'm not pretending," she whispers into Callie's ear. "I care about you, Calliope." _I love you._

"But you said..." Arizona can hear the sob catching in Callie's throat.

"I was mad. I lied."

"Okay."

She sounds like a scared, compliant child and it makes Arizona's heart break. "You should try to get some sleep," she suggests.

Callie nods, obediently pulling away. Arizona watches as she lays down, winching as she brushes against the cut. The exhaustion then comes back, hitting Arizona full-force. She stands reluctantly to leave for another on-call room so Callie can have some peace and quiet to sleep in.

Then she hears a weak, unsure, "Stay?"

Arizona looks at Callie, then nods. "Okay." _Always._

She crawls into the bed beside Callie and, despite everything, a small smile graces her face as the brunette buries her head in her shoulder.

And Callie can't help but think that maybe she can have a few hours of perfection, even if it won't last any longer than they time they spend sleeping.

_  
"Stay,  
Everything is wrong without you  
Stay,  
My whole world's a wreck  
Oh will you save me now?"  
"_Crazy Ever After_" - The Rescues_


	7. Bend and Not Break

Disclaimer: Great news! They decided to give me Grey's Anatomy, as well as the rights to the song. Yepp. Well, then I woke up, and realized I still don't own anything.  
A/N: This one might seem like a little bit of a filler chapter - it's not as heavy as the other ones have been, at least I don't think so - but it really is important. It's got a lot of backstory, I guess you could say. Well, I don't know. Take it as you will - I don't want to spoil it, haha. Enjoy!

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 7 : Bend and Not Break  
**

Something pulling at her hair forces Callie awake. She blinks a few times in an attempt to focus and, when she finally does, a sleeping blond greets her eyes. The next thing she notices is their position. One of Arizona's arm is under her, and the hand attached to it is tangled up in her hair - Arizona must have moved it, causing her to wake up. The other arm is just under her shirt, the pads of her fingers lightly touching the skin of Callie's stomach just under the cut. Callie's arm is wrapped around the slightly older woman's waist, pressing her closer to her. Her other arm is squeezed in between their bodies, the only thing keeping them as separated as they are. Arizona's right leg has wedged itself between Callie's legs, and she finds herself silently thankful that it is as low as it is. A few inches higher and...

Callie swallows, letting her eyelids flutter closed. Why did she let this happen? This is only going to make things harder, more awkward. Going back to this will make it harder for her to move on. She knows Arizona doesn't have to worry about that being a problem. She's already gotten a head start on the "moving on" process, if that redheaded nurse is any indication.

And then there's Jose. What is she going to do about him? What is she going to do about Arizona _knowing_ about him? She knows he won't just leave, he told her that a few hours ago. She knows he can't go home, because he said her dad knows. If her dad knows, Jose is probably _afraid _to go back.

There was always the mask of acceptance on his face, but Callie has always known how much Jose hates her dad. To Jose, Carlos Torres is the reason for the end of his relationship with Callie and Aria's mother. When this all started happening, Callie thought it was because _she_ had done something wrong. Now, she thinks it really boils down to the complicated mess that is her mom's relationship track record. Everything he has done to her, at least at the beginning, was spiteful. It was the only way he could get back at Carlos without being kicked out of Aria's life.

That would have destroyed him, and she knows it. No matter how much he hurt her, Callie has always known that Aria means (_meant, _she tells herself) the world to Jose. He wanted nothing more than to be there for her, to support her, to be the best father he could for her.

Which would explain why he's here now, Callie decides. Aria is dead, so he has no reason to stay in Florida anymore. He has no reason to hide who he is. That would explain why he's gotten so public, so risky, with everything he's done. Aria is the only thing he really lived for and now that he doesn't have that, what does he have to worry about? Everybody could know and it wouldn't make a difference to him, not really, because no matter what they did to him they didn't have anything else left to take from him.

It almost makes Callie feel bad for him. Almost.

She wants to pull Arizona closer and pretend to still be asleep, but she doesn't. She knows this feels right, like it did before all of this starting pushing its way back into her life. She knows this is what she has been longing for, wishing for, waiting for, and wanting to get back. But she doesn't know what to do now that she is in this moment, especially considering the conscious moments preceding it. She felt so weak, so vulnerable in those minutes. How is she supposed to act after that?

Confrontation, of this nature, isn't something Callie is good at, at least not in her own eyes. She always ends up saying the wrong things and making everything end up so much worse than it was to begin with.

So she carefully untangles herself from Arizona and slips out of bed. The blond stirs but doesn't wake up, and Callie lets out a relieved breath. She doesn't want to do this, but confrontation is not on her "to-do" list today. Neither is heartbreak or making even more of a fool out of herself.

With a final glance at the peaceful, sleeping blond surgeon, Callie slips silently out of the on-call room and into the bustling hallway. She glances at the cell phone in her pocket for the time and sighs as she realizes it isn't quite time for lunch yet. There's still another hour or two before her friends will show up in the cafeteria, and she needs something to do until then. Rounds, maybe?

For some reason, she really wants to eat lunch with her colleagues today. Maybe it's because Arizona knows or because Jose is there, but she suddenly wants to eat with them. Maybe she wants to convince them that she is okay or maybe she simply misses their conversations. Her emotions are so jumbled up right now that she isn't sure. All she knows is Arizona is asleep and will hopefully remain asleep through lunch, so they won't have to deal with the awkwardness of eating with her.

Almost everybody is there when she walks in after her rounds. Nobody has taken over her usual seat and that is enough to bring a small smile to her face as she sits down beside Mark. Everybody looks at her with shock written across their faces until Mark wraps an arm around her shoulders and grins. He pokes her stomach teasingly, giving her a concerned glance as she winces in pain. "Later," she mouths, and he nods. She's grateful that he lets it go, because honestly, she has no intentions of telling him.

He turns back to the others and decides to continue the conversation from earlier. "Owen?" he asks, popping a fry into his mouth.

The redhead thinks for a second, then answers, "Sixteen, in the backseat of my first car."

"Ooh, same age as Yang."

"Same age as Yang's what?" Callie asks, holding back a cringe as Arizona and Lexie sit down at the table. There goes the possibility of getting through lunch without awkward glances and conversations. And when did Lexie start sitting with Mark again? Are they back together? Callie sighs. Has she really missed that much in only the past three weeks?

"We're talking about the first time we had sex," Mark clarifies, ignoring Arizona and Lexie as they roll their eyes. Arizona is the only one who notices Callie shift uncomfortably in her seat, and her stomach sinks as she takes a guess as to why.

"We'll talk later," Arizona whispers into Callie's ear as the conversation continues around them, her words loaded with double meanings. The brunette gives her a barely perceptible nod.

"And for Sloan, it's some sort of competition," Owen remarks with an amused shake of his head.

"Fourteen," Mark says proudly.

Callie forces a smile. Why did they have to have this conversation today, of all days? They've had roughly three weeks to have it without her, and yet the day she finally decides to eat with them, they decide would be the perfect day to talk about it.

"I think it's Cal's turn now," he adds.

Arizona must notice the other woman's reluctance because she quickly says, "My first time was on my eighteenth birthday. It's a little late, I know, but we wanted it to be special." Callie shoots her a thankful glance and Arizona smiles at her reassuringly.

"Eighteen, Blondie? Really?" Cristina tilts her head to the side and watches her disbelievingly.

Arizona just nods, unbothered. "We planned it out and everything. Roses, candles, the whole nine yards."

She sighs as nobody says anything for a minute, and Mark tries again, "What about you--"

This time, it's Lexie to the rescue. She receives a text message before Mark asks, and it doesn't get past Callie that Arizona just sent one. How else would the newly-blond intern know to jump in? "I was, uh, I was... A senior in high school. Seventeen, maybe eighteen? I... I can't really remember, but it was something like that..." she says, obviously uncomfortable discussing it.

Mark raises an eyebrow. "Not as old as I thought," he says, earning a playful smack in the arm from Lexie.

"You'd almost think they don't want Callie to share," Owen jokes. "Were you really old or something, Cal?"

_Well, great, _she thinks, _nobody to save me now. Now I'm going to _have_ to answer. _Her mind races as she tries to decide on an age to give them. She doesn't want to lie - it wouldn't be right - but there are two ages she can give them. One that is technical, and one that, in her mind, really counts.

She looks at their expectant faces, all but Arizona waiting impatiently, and decides to go with the safer choice. The older age. Reluctantly, she says, "Eleven." Then, as if it makes a difference, she adds, "But I was almost twelve, so..."

"Damn, Torres, eleven?" is all Mark can manage. Everyone else is silently staring, so she does all she can and nods.

Finally, Owen says, "Wow," and it seems to break the silence that has fallen upon them.

"Still proud of fourteen, Mark?" Cristina asks with a smug grin.

"Shut up, sixteen," he grumbles, glancing at the younger doctor for a split second before turning back to Callie. "That's, like, sixth grade, isn't it?"

She sighs. "The summer after. I met him at the beach."

"Older?"

"Two years."

Callie stares at her tray. It's not exactly something she wanted to share, and especially not with everyone. Mark gives her a congratulatory pat on the back and she knows he has accepted "defeat."

Given their reactions to eleven, she's glad that she didn't choose to tell them the younger number.

She can feel Arizona's eyes searching her face and that simple action is enough to let Callie now the blond is fully aware there is more to the story. Well, she had to tell someone eventually, right? With her luck, it only figures it would be Arizona. And after they broke up, at that. Irony really seems to love her sometimes.

Now that Arizona knows pieces of the story, Callie is sure that the blond will want to try to work things out. She'll feel guilty for leaving how she did and she'll feel pity for what Callie has been through and she'll try to fix it the only way she knows how. She'll feel bad and that will lead her to try to fix things with Callie.

She stares at her drink. Sure, she's wanted to get back together with Arizona for weeks now. She's wanted to be happy with the blond for months. But she doesn't to get back together because Arizona feels bad. She doesn't want - doesn't _need _- the pity. And why is she even assuming Arizona will want to get back together with her? What's to say that she won't be completely, utterly disgusted as soon as she realizes the abuse went deeper than what she saw in the hall?

Callie sighs, looking up and trying to get caught back up in the conversation that has continued without her. She is starting to understand what they're talking about when her phone vibrates in her pocket. She pulls the cell phone out and glances at the caller ID before flipping it open. She's made the mistake of not looking too many times before.

"Hey, babe," she answers, the endearment slipping off her tongue without a second thought. It earns a glance from Mark and Arizona, though each for different reasons, while the other three continue talking as normal. Mark already knows exactly who she's talking to simply by the way she answered and, from the looks of it, Arizona is dying to find out. There's a look in her eyes that Callie can't quite decipher. Is it jealousy, protectiveness, or plain curiosity?

"Hey, Cal," comes the familiar voice that she misses so much. Callie can't hold back the small smile as it spreads across her face. "How're you holding up over there?"

"Fine, I guess. We're just eating lunch."

"We? There's a 'we' now?"

"Same as ever. Mark, Cristina, Arizona, Owen, and Lexie."

She had hoped that throwing Arizona's name in the middle would throw Addison off, but she had no such luck. "Arizona? Are you two...?" The redhead knows she doesn't even have to finish.

"I don't know."

"Have you been...?"

"No."

"You two should talk."

"I... I don't know what to say."

"Tell her the truth," Addison suggests.

"It's not that easy."

Addison understands her friend's tone and decides not to push it - after all, _she _doesn't even know the full story. The pieces she has are too small for her to even attempt to stick together. So she decides to lighten the mood a little bit. A smile crosses her face as she says, "You managed to tell Mark you didn't love his penis anymore, didn't you?" The fact that the situations are nowhere near similar makes Callie smile and groan.

"Really, Addison? Back to the 'I love penis' thing?"

"And vagina monologues!" she quips.

"You'll never let me live that down, will you?" Callie can't help but grin. Gosh, does she miss Addison...

"Wasn't planning on it," Addison replies, and Callie can hear the grin in her voice. The brunette rolls her eyes. She can hear someone calling for 'Dr. Montgomery' in the background, and soon enough, Addison is saying, "Sorry, Callie, but I've got to go..."

Callie sighs. "Bye, Addie," she says, but waits until she hears a "Bye, Cal," and then a "Call me later!" before hanging up.

She slips the phone into her pocket and looks up into the faces of her friends. "What?" she asks when she realizes they're all staring at her.

"'I love penis'?" is all Owen can come up with. Mark gives her a funny look, too, and even Cristina looks interested. Callie had almost forgotten that the conversation and remained a sort of inside joke between her and the neonatal surgeon.

"It's..." Callie trails off, searching for something to say, before deciding on, "It was a long time ago."

Mark breaks into a grin. "Vagina monologues?" he asks, wiggling his eyebrows. Of _course _he had to overhear that.

"I'm going to kill Addison," she mumbles, becoming suddenly interested in her food. She takes a bite of her sandwich and Owen and Cristina fall back into their own conversation. Lexie looks on with confusion written all over her face.

"How's she doing?" Mark asks after a few seconds, ignoring the glare that Lexie sends him. It's obvious that he feels bad for whatever it is he did to her - Callie has still not been filled in with the details - and they haven't talked much since everything happened. Every conversation they have had has revolved around their mutual concern for Callie.

"She's... fine," Callie answers. If Addison wanted him to know anything more than that, she could tell him herself.

The subject is dropped and they fall into a comfortable silence. Lexie is the first one to break it as she asks, "What's a vagina monologue?"

Arizona chimes in with, "Does it mean what I think it does?"

Callie sighs with relief as her pager goes off. She looks at Arizona and says, "Yes." She then turns to Mark and tells him, "Explain it to Little Grey," before going to dump her tray and rushing down the hall.

_"Try to understand,  
There's an old mistake  
That fools will make _  
_ And I'm the king of them,  
Pushing everything that's good away"  
"_Bend and Not Break_" - Dashboard Confessional_


	8. That's Alright

Disclaimer: Not mine.  
A/N: ....And here is the moment you have all been waiting for! Sort of. Have fun. (:

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It.  
Chapter 8 : That's Alright**

Callie finishes setting the bone and steps out of the room. Her plan is to take a quick trip to the bathroom when someone behind her calls, "Dr. Torres!" and she promptly stops. She turns around on her heel and comes face-to-face with the redheaded nurse she saw with Arizona. What in the hell could she want?

"Yes?" Callie asks, trying to keep the anger and annoyance out of her voice. _Stay professional, Torres,_ she tells herself.

"Dr. Robbins and I--" she begins, but she doesn't get the chance to finish.

Callie feels the anger swell in her the very second Arizona's name comes out of the other woman's mouth. She really, really does not have the time or the patience to deal with this right now. "Who the hell are you?" she demands.

"Amber Elliot," the redhead replies coolly. She continues as though the interruption didn't bother her, "I just think you should know that what you had with Dr. Robbins is over now. It's time that you back off."

There's a second there that Callie wonders if this woman is hearing her own words. Were they back in the seventh grade or something? "I need to back off?" Callie repeats. "_I _need to back off? I was _there_ when she told me it was over, okay? I think I know better than you do, Nurse Elliot." She spits the redhead's name out with more spite and contempt than she can ever remember using before - well, a certain Izzie Stevens may have gotten the same kind of treatment a few years ago.

Amber scoffs. "Just remember that, Dr. Torres, and we'll be fine," she says before turning and walking away.

Callie glares at the redhead's retreating figure. She sighs, shakes her head, and turns back to go the bathroom. It's not like Arizona cares anyway, right? She shouldn't have listened in that on-call room. She shouldn't have been foolish enough to believe the words that came out of the blond's mouth. She was right to begin with.

"I was almost looking forward to a fight," a voice says from behind her, and she knows who it is before she even turns around. When she does, though, she finds Jose is walking towards her. "You haven't gotten in one since about middle school, have you? Good to know that you at least remember _that _lesson." He smirks.

"What are you still doing here?" Callie demands, trying to keep her gaze as steady as she can. The last thing she needs is to falter and give him yet another reason to do what he does.

"Giving you this." Jose slides a slip of paper into her hand. She looks at it quickly, her eyes scanning over the address written there. "As soon as you get off," he orders, "you meet me there. Okay?"

She merely glares at him, crumpling the paper in her hand and letting it fall to the ground before turning and walking towards the bathroom.

"I'll wait at your apartment, then," he says easily. She turns to face him in a heartbeat. Are they ever going to let her go?

"What?"

"I'll wait at your apartment," he repeats.

She walks back over to him and picks the paper off the ground. She wouldn't put it past him to know where her apartment is, and she knows very well that he can pick a lock. "As soon as my shift is over," she agrees reluctantly. He smirks, knowing he's won, and nods. Callie bites her lip as he walks away.

What has she gotten herself into?

_Room 206._

She reads it over and over again, the messily written address imprinting itself into her brain. Why does he want her to go to this hotel, to see him outside of the hospital, so badly? It's where he's staying, obviously, and there's more chances for him to hit her, but there has to be more than that. He's always had his reasons, his backstory, when he hit her. The reasons never justified it, at least not to her, but they were still there. There has to be more to this situation. It isn't adding up. She has to be missing something.

All needs for the bathroom have been forgotten as she stares at the white slip of paper. The noises of the hospital are not quite reaching her ears and the people walking up and down the hallway she's standing in may as well not exist. Every ounce of concentration Callie has left is being used on this small amount of information.

A hand comes to rest on her shoulder and her head snaps up to look at the culprit as she jumps in surprise. There stands a very confused-looking Arizona, focused on the same piece of paper.

"Room 206, Mason Hotel?" Arizona reads. "What's that for, Calliope?"

Callie shrugs, shoves the paper into her pocket, and eyes Arizona warily. Besides Jose, the only thoughts running through her mind right now are of Amber and Arizona. Nurse Amber Elliot did not seem particularly intimidating - and if it came down to a fight like Jose so wanted to see, there is no doubt that Callie would win in a heartbeat - but if that woman is who Arizona wants, who is Callie to do anything but attempt to accept it?

"Did you need something?" Callie asks, nearly cringing at how cold she sounds. She didn't mean for it to come out like that.

Arizona looks taken aback. "I just thought we could talk," she says, a twinge of sadness and hurt in her voice.

Callie sighs as the guilt settles in. She hates it when Arizona is upset, and even more so when she is the cause. "Alright, let's talk," she says, somewhat reluctantly.

Arizona's face brightens and Callie smiles despite the sinking feeling in her stomach as the blond leads her to an empty on-call room.

----

Callie shoves her hands into her pockets as Arizona opens the door to the first free on-call room they've found. She suddenly feels nervous, despite all of her attempts to calm herself down. She doesn't know what Arizona wants to talk about and the not knowing is making her heart race. After all, she doesn't exactly prefer any of the possibilities. It could be about Jose, them, Nicole, some other patient, or even Amber. None of those exactly jump out at her saying _talk about me!_

She slowly follows Arizona into the room, kicking the door closed behind her_. _She doesn't want to take her hands out of her pockets because in a way, it makes her feel just a little bit better. It's a comfort issue, a nervous habit. That, and her fist is closed tightly and Jose's note. She has the address memorized, but the last thing she needs to do is lose it. She knows that if somebody found it, it wouldn't be too big of a deal - it wouldn't make sense to anyone - and maybe that makes her fear irrational, but she doesn't care. She doesn't want anyone else to know, whether they understand or not.

Arizona pats the bed beside her, a silent suggestion that Callie should sit down. The brunette swallows thickly before walking over and gently sitting down, careful to leave a good amount of space between them.

They sit in silence for a minute, both trying to find the right words to say. Finally Arizona settles on something and she speaks, her words effectively cutting through the jumbled mess of thoughts running through Callie's brain. "Was eleven before or after Jose?" Arizona asks carefully, afraid that maybe she's starting off wrong. Maybe she should have tried talking about _them_ first.

It takes time for Callie to organize her thoughts enough to answer. "After," she says quietly.

When Callie doesn't say anything else, Arizona asks, "Do you want to talk about it?" She realizes that it's not the best question to ask, but it's the only coherent question she could manage.

The brunette shrugs. A part of her wants to say _"not really"_ while another part of her wants to blurt everything out. Both sides of her battle until one finally wins out. "I used to idolize him," she says eventually. "Not like Aria did, but I still really looked up to him. I was... Six, maybe, when everything started. He would just push me around every now and then, hold onto my hand too hard, smack me. Nothing too serious..." She swallows, trying to keep her voice from shaking. "I was nine when it started becoming more than that. That's why at the beach I didn't give it much thought. I mean, by that time I knew it was wrong of Jose, but... I don't know. I guess when it came to other guys and I was, you know, giving them permission... Maybe it was a control thing? I couldn't really tell anyone, so I didn't really get a say in a lot of other things in my life, so...

"But, uh, anyway... Aria loved him. She used to - to get mad at me be-because she thought..." She's finding it hard to get the words out. Arizona gently lays a hand on her knee and she tries not to flinch at the soft contact. Silent tears are streaming down her face as she holds back sobs, all the time thinking, _why are you telling her this? _"She always said I was stealing her dad away from her," she continues. "And I guess I kinda was. It got to the point where he was spending more time with me than with her. He didn't mean to hurt Aria with all of this, she was his world, and I wanted to let her know that. But I couldn't - I couldn't tell her, or any of them."

"Calliope..."

Callie shakes her head. She's come this far, now she just wants to get the rest of it out. "I turned sixteen and everything changed. Jose wasn't... He wasn't careful enough. I..." She stares at the ground. "I got..." She squeezes her eyes closed and tells herself, _you can still back out, _but she know she won't. "Brandon."

Arizona looks at her with confusion etched across her features. She's about to ask when it hits her. "You were his mother," she whispers in understanding.

Callie nods but doesn't open her eyes. "Aria and Damien were already engaged, so Daddy convinced them to take him. Aria couldn't... She was infertile, I mean, so... Dad convinced them it was now or never." Callie wipes the tears from her eyes and takes a minute to control herself before looking up at Arizona. "I became Aunt Callie and Aria became Mommy. It hurt, though, to always see them.. The perfect, happy family. They always thought his dad was some random guy I met at a basketball game, so when he ended up looking so much like Aria, everyone was thrilled. Except Jose... He was pissed. He thought that with keeping him in the family, they were all going to figure it out, he thought he was about to get caught."

"But he wasn't?"

Callie shakes her head. "No. Not then, anyway. My - my dad... He just found out." She hangs her head as more tears start to escape her.

Arizona isn't sure what to do. She has never seen Callie look so destroyed, so broken. Everything she has just heard is still processing in her brain and with all the thoughts running through her head, she isn't sure what to say. She isn't sure if there is anything _to _say. Nothing seems to be enough. Now words seem to mean what she wants to say.

So she whispers, "Come here." As Callie obediently slides closer, Arizona wraps her arms around her and lets her sob into her chest. "It's okay," she whispers, among other things, as she gently rubs Callie's back.

The sobs subside as Callie starts to get a handle on herself, until even stray tears are a thing of the past. Yet she makes no attempt to move away from the blond's arms. She is perfectly content breathing in Arizona's comforting scent and letting it wash over her. Just being in the other woman's arms makes her feel safer than she has in a long time.

They sit like this for minutes on end. Callie is nearly on Arizona's lap, her head nestled in her shoulder. Arizona has the brunette wrapped tightly in her arms and has her head turned so she can rest her chin on top of the raven-colored curls.

Then Arizona ruins the moment by asking softly, "Are you okay, Calliope?" She knows that Callie is not 'okay' - not after all that - but she felt compelled to ask anyway.

Callie pulls back and nods. "I'm fine," she says unconvincingly as she sniffles.

Arizona nods. She doesn't want to push it. "Is there anything I can--"

"How do you do it?" Callie interrupts, and when Arizona's blue eyes look at her in confusion, she sighs. "We broke up three weeks ago. Maybe that's a long time for you, but... But it's not for me. And you're already dating and always calm and... and you're still McPerky and trying to be friends and... How do you do it? Because I can't. I can't figure out how to do it. Three weeks isn't long enough for me and I haven't moved on and I... I just... How do you do it?"

Somewhere during her ramble Callie ended up pacing up and down the length of the on-call room with tears running down her face. Arizona stares at her blankly, again at a loss for words. The blond is starting to speak when the shrill beep of a pager fills the room. Both surgeons check their waists reluctantly, and Callie's back goes ramrod straight when she sees that she is the one being paged. She gives Arizona a curt nod and rushes out of the room.

Not only did she just pour her heart out, but she embarrassed herself and now Arizona knows nearly everything. Callie shakes her head at herself as she runs down the hallway.

_Great._

----

A sigh escapes Callie's lips as she steps into the stairwell. This day has been dragging on for so long, but now that it's nearly over, she's wishing she was on the twenty-four hour shift. She wasn't even on the schedule today and they have still had her running around like a pack mule, doing small tasks that could have easily waited until tomorrow, but now that she doesn't want to leave Derek is telling her to go home in an hour or two.

Right before the door shuts behind her, she hears a "Calliope!" being shouted at her. Oh, no. The last thing she wants is to have to talk to Arizona. Not after making a fool of herself like she did in that on-call room. Not after sharing all of that about her past. She didn't want anyone to know, and she should have kept her mouth shut. Why couldn't she have kept her mouth shut?

Arizona comes bursting through the door and Callie turns to face her. She's standing down on the first landing, now regretting not rushing down the stairs, as Arizona slowly walks down to stand closer to her. Arizona is panting slightly. Callie assumes that she had run down the hallway to reach her in time. When Arizona reaches the stair above her, Callie swallows - it just so happens that this is the same stairwell they had always run into each other. Their "make-out stairway" of sorts. Why hadn't she remembered that until just now?

She's in the middle of berating herself when Arizona lays a hand on her shoulder. Slowly, Callie turns her head to face the blond. Of all the possible scenarios running through her brain, the rough kiss that Arizona forces on her was not one of them.

"I don't," she whispers softly, her breath tickling Callie's cheek. She removes her hand from Callie's shoulder and continues down the stairs before the brunette can even process what happened.

"_Show me how defenseless you really are_  
_Satisfied and empty inside_  
_Well, that's alright_  
_Lets give this another try_"  
_"_So Cold_" - Breaking Benjamin_


	9. Bleed

Disclaimer: Sorry, but I still don't own it.  
A/N: Here is chapter nine! Thank you to everyone who reviewed the last chapter, I'm ready glad y'all liked it! (: As for Thursday's episode (spoilers ahead, folks), I loved how Arizona treated Alex... She wasn't mean, but she didn't just let it go either... I loved it, haha. And I'm glad she's trying to be friends with Teddy. Teddy needs some friends, and I like her. I hope she doesn't just leave. Mark is starting to get on my nerves a little bit. He and Lexie broke up, so he doesn't get to be mad at Alex. And does Arizona know about Callie offering to raise Baby Sloan? I was waiting for some sort of confrontation about that, but it didn't happen, so now I'm wondering if she even knows. Anyway, that's enough of my rambling, so enjoy the chapter!

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 9 : Bleed**

The cold air hits her as she steps outside. Callie's shift is officially over, which means she doesn't have to deal with any more annoying patients or incompetent interns, but that isn't enough to make her glad to be leaving. The kiss from Arizona is weighing heavily on her mind - her lips still tingle where Arizona's touched, and she can still taste the blond's chapstick on her lips. All she wants is to feel that again, to have Arizona beside her again, in her arms...

Then she remembers Jose, and how she has to go meet him. Everything in her is screaming, _"don't go!"_ but she doesn't feel like she has much of a choice. It's now or later. It's at the hospital, her apartment, or his hotel. This seems like the safest choice, the best time, the best place. It shouldn't take too long, either.

She adjusts the bag on her shoulder and starts walking. It's about eight now, and there's no telling when Jose will decide he's done with her. Hopefully it won't take too long. She doesn't want to spend more time with him than absolutely necessary.

As she slides into her car, Callie suddenly remembers that Mark gets off in a few hours. An idea starts to form in her head and she digs through her purse for her cell phone. She sends him a text telling him to page her if she isn't at her apartment by the time he gets there. Cristina is on-call tonight anyway, so it's not like him banging on the door will disturb anyone. She waits for his confirmation text (it's a simple "ok") before pulling out of the parking lot and making her way to the hotel that Jose had to told her to meet him at.

It's obvious that he has been waiting on her because he pulls open the door and urges her inside before she even finishes knocking. Callie slips into the room and an uneasy feeling settles on her, but she shakes it off. Of course she feels uneasy; she's standing alone in a room with Jose.

"Have a seat," he offers, and she nods. She walks over to the chair and gently sits on it. The room looks old and dirty and she wouldn't have been surprised if a dust cloud had come up when she put her weight on the furniture. He takes a seat on the couch, and she's glad that she took the chair. She may have had to sit by him had she chosen the sofa.

"Why did you want me to come here?" Callie asks, cutting to the chase.

"I have news," he says slowly. Callie waits impatiently for him to tell her, and so eventually he sighs. "Damien is out of his coma."

She can't help but smile. "That's great!" she exclaims. Then she notices his averted gaze, closed fists, and deep frown. "What?" she asks. "Why isn't that good news?"

Another sigh escapes Jose's lips. "He has amnesia," he says. "He thinks Brandon is still alive."

Realization starts to sink in and the pieces start to fall together. Damien thinks Brandon is _alive. _He doesn't remember the past, what, 10 years? Maybe more than that? He's stuck in the past. Plus, her dad knows about Jose. It's only a matter of time before Carlos tells everybody, and then Damien will have little trouble figuring out the connection. He's not stupid.

They sit in silence as the information continues to process in Callie's brain. A few times she has tried to speak, only to find her sentences come out incoherent and incomplete. Jose waits, seemingly patient, for her to get a hold on herself and the situation.

"How do you know?" Callie finally asks. Her father wouldn't call and tell him, not if he really knew, and it's doubtful that her mom would call either. Carlos has probably already ordered her not to talk to Jose.

A small smirk tugs at Jose's lips. "Your aunt told me," he says. It makes sense. Jose and her mother's sister have always been close friends. In fact, according to the stories Callie remembers, her aunt is how her mom met both Jose _and _Carlos. And goodness knows her aunt wouldn't pay any attention to an order from Callie's father.

Callie nods. What is she supposed to say now? '_Well, that sucks'? 'Too bad'? _It's a wonder that Damien even woke up after so many months. She can't be disappointed or upset. He's awake, he's alive. That's reason to celebrate.

"I think your dad plans to tell them tonight," Jose says. "I wonder how they'll take it?" His voice sounds much too calm for the situation. There is no underlying anger, no edge of spite, no hint of fear. He sounds calm and almost confident.

That scars her. She studies his face carefully, looking for any flaws in the mask Jose has set in place. She finds very few and the ones she does find do little to ease her mind. There's a defiant smirk tugging at the corners of his lips and a flash of triumph in his eyes. His eyebrows are raised just a few centimeters higher than normal, almost in a "try me" or "hit me with your best shot" manner. He is sitting up straight with his head held high, and everything about his posture screams "_proud_."

Callie shifts uncomfortably in her seat before she can tell herself not to, and this does not go unnoticed by Jose. He lets out a throaty, amused chuckle at her. She looks at him strangely, because he's acting very out of character and she doesn't like it at all. She would rather have the old Jose back, the one she had been confronted with a few hours ago. Then she would at least know what to expect. The not-knowing is worse than anything.

She glances at the clock on the wall and has to hold back a sigh. She has nearly another hour before Mark gets off and can page her. It's going to be a long hour, but there's a part of her that still hopes she's wrong and it will go by quickly. Or maybe Jose will decide he's done with her before then. That is even more doubtful, but one can hope, right?

"Would you like a glass of wine?" Jose offers suddenly, pushing himself off the couch and making his way to the small kitchen.

"No, I'm good," she says. She really wouldn't mind a glass of wine - or, more preferably, something much stronger - but she doesn't want to drink with Jose. It's probably not his style, but she doesn't want to worry about arsenic or poisoning. And even without that, the alcohol would cloud her judgement. There's no telling what she would say or do or what he would be able to get away with. She needs to keep her thinking sharp, her reflexes quick.

"What's one glass going to hurt, Calliope?" he asks as he pulls out two bottles. It sure doesn't look like he's planning on just one glass.

Callie has to bite her tongue to keep from saying anything about his use of her full name. She shrugs even though he isn't looking at her at the moment and says carefully, "Really, I'm fine."

She watches as he pulls down two wine glasses despite her protests. There's a second while he's reaching into the cabinet that she gets a good look at him, and in that second, she wonders how she let him take such control over her. She can understand when she was little. Jose has always been a strong man, and that hasn't changed over the years. But now she's strong, too, or at least she thought she was. She's tough and independent and hell, she's badass. She's a rockstar. She breaks bones for a living. And yet here Jose is, with his thinning gray hair and his wrinkling skin, striking fear in her. He's an accountant. He works with numbers all day. He's sharp and strong, maybe even stronger than her, but she could give him a run for her money and she knows it. They both know it. She could fight back, or she could call the cops. She could do _something._

Yet her she sits, taking the glass of wine that he hands to her, even though she doesn't plan to drink it. All because she's too afraid to say no. All because those 'lessons' he taught her so many years ago are now ingrained into her brain, to the point that she wouldn't dare to break the rules. All because she was too scared to tell anyone all those years back, too scared to get help.

He has settled back on the couch and is watching her as he sips his wine. One of the two bottles sits on the coffee table between them. She brings the glass to her lips and pretends to take a sip, partly so he thinks she's drinking and partly because she just wants to have something to do.

They sit in silence until Jose sets his now-empty wine glass on the table and clears his throat. "So, your father tells us you're gay now."

"Yeah," she says, trying to keep her voice steady. What does this have to do with anything?

"What brought this on?" he asks as he leans back into the sofa.

She shrugs. "I don't know," she says simply. She isn't sure if she should be annoyed or worried or relieved. Is it a good thing or a bad thing that he's bringing it up?

He nods. "You know, your sister didn't approve of that sort of thing."

"I know. She barely talked to me." Definitely not a good thing.

"Was it really worth all of that, Calliope? Is liking a woman really worth losing your whole family over?" He watches her carefully. She's sure he sees the pain that has found its way into her eyes. She's sure he has noticed that she's sitting even straighter, her muscles tensed.

"Jose..."

"It's a simple question, Calliope."

Callie sighs. "It's not a choice."

"Okay," he says, but Callie can see the wheels turning in his head.

They fall back to an awkward silence, and that is how they sit for the remainder of the time. Sometimes Jose attempts to start a conversation, but none are ever anything Callie is interested in talking about or sharing. He's about to say something else when her pager goes off. She fights to keep the relieved smile from her face as she takes the pager out of her purse and checks it, just in case it isn't a real emergency. Plus, she has to make it _look _real. She leans forward, placing her barely-used wine glass onto the coffee table before standing up.

"I've got to take this," she tells him, holding the pager up in case he needed proof.

"Alright," Jose agrees. "Go save lives." He gets up to walk her to the door, and she gives him a weird look. This is just another out-of-character thing to add to the list.

They have nearly reached the door when he shoves her backward. She stumbles, but manages to keep herself from falling. He steps up to her, grabbing her arm with his left hand. "You aren't going anywhere," he says through clenched teeth, pushing himself so close to her that they are nearly touching.

She's about to protest when his arm brushes against her stomach. The next thing she knows, cold steel is pressing against her bare skin as Jose pushes his knife into her stomach.

_"__What you found sure upset you_  
_ Never saw it coming, did you?  
It's easy to be surprised with__  
Both your eyes sewn closed_  
_ Handled with great precision _  
_ Another faultless execution.__"_  
_"_If You Can't Leave It Be, Might As Well Make It Bleed_" - Dashboard Confessional_


	10. Survive

Disclaimer: Uhm, yeah. They still haven't tried to sell me Grey's Anatomy, and I still don't have enough money to try to buy it.  
A/N: This isn't quite what you guys asked for, I don't think, but I kinda like it anyway. (: The _italics _are flashbacks, sort of, and they should make more sense when the next chapter comes around. This one was easier to write than the last chapter, and I think it turned out a little bit better, too, though I wasn't too sure about Cristina... Well, what do _you_ think?

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 10 : Survive**

A gasp escapes her lips as the knife settles in her stomach. Her knees buckle out from under her but Jose grabs her, keeping her up. The pain has already started shooting through her body, and she can feel the blood slowly starting to soak through her shirt. He forces her head up and when she refuses to meet his eyes, he squeezes his hand around her jaw and sends his knee up until it connects with her stomach. She hears something crack and feels the knife move in her stomach. When the pain begins to melt together, and she decides she just wants it to _stop, _she moves to meet his gaze. His eyes hold the anger and hatred and disgust she's accustomed to, only there's more of it now than she remembers ever seeing before. She's sure he can see the pain and questions in her own eyes because soon enough, he's giving her the closest thing to an answer that she had expected.

"Your father would be calling you soon, trying to find me," he says, and there is no remorse lying under the coldness of his voice. "And Damien will be close to figuring out about Brandon as well."

And that is all the answer Callie needs. She tries to figure it all out just from that, but her head is starting to feel light on her shoulders and the thoughts keep getting jumbled up. Then she decides that he must be afraid of Carlos. But then what about Damien? He'll be told about Brandon soon anyway, so why is Jose so concerned? His grip on her loosens ever-so-slightly and she winces as her knees fall from underneath her just a little bit more. She doesn't want to die here, not now, not like this...

"Brandon was in a nasty accident, wasn't he?" Jose whispers in her ear before taking a step backwards. He lets go of her arm and though she tries to fight to stay up, her legs collapse underneath her. She hears him chuckle, then footsteps move away from her, but it isn't until she hears the door start to open that she looks up at him. He looks back at her and smirks as the hatred intensifies in her eyes. The realization has settled over her face and she doesn't think she's ever hated him as much as she does now.

The door closes behind Jose and Callie pulls herself towards her purse, trying her best to ignore the pain that shoots through her. She can feel the blood smear against the carpet as she moves. She has her hand in her purse and is fishing for her cell phone when her pager goes off again, and the beeping is almost enough to make her head explode. Her temples are once again throbbing, but right now, she's wishing she still had a hangover instead of this.

She shoves the pager as far away from her as she can, hoping that it will lessen the sound a little bit. Her hand tightens around her phone and she sighs in relief as she pulls it out. She fumbles with it for a second before managing to flip it open. She presses the buttons but her vision is starting to blur and she has to try a few times before she gets the correct three numbers in and can hit the 'send' button. The woman who answers makes her repeat herself several times and asks a bunch of pointless questions, but after a few tries Callie gets her to understand the location, her name, and what's wrong. The lady promises that an ambulance will be there soon and that is all Callie needs to hear. She drops the phone without even bothering to hang up; she can hear the woman's voice still coming out of the earpiece but she can't make out any of the words. She presses her hands around the knife in a futile attempt to stop, or at least slow down, the bleeding.

Finally, as consciousness starts to fade away from her, she lets her head rest against the dirty carpet. The last thing she hears before everything goes black are sirens and a group of people running down the hallway.

----

"Since when do you knock, Cal?" Mark calls as he gets up from the couch and walks towards his door. It's been about half an hour since he paged her, so he assumed she would be home by now. He pulls the door open and his eyebrows furrow in confusion when he notices it isn't Callie at all. "Arizona?"

"Hey," she says quickly, and he notices that she looks just as frantic as she sounds. "Have you seen Calliope?"

"No," he answers, the confusion still evident in his face and voice. "I paged her a little bit ago. She told me to if she wasn't home when I got off."

"Did she say where she was going?" Arizona asks, but she's pretty sure she already knows where the brunette is.

"No." He opens the door even more. "Come in," he offers, then adds, "and tell me what's going on. Why are you freaking out?"

Arizona just shakes her head. "I've got... I have to go," she says, but she only makes it halfway down the hall before both of their pagers start going off.

Mark grabs his jacket and is out the door without a single glance at his pager, and manages to make it into the elevator right behind Arizona. He takes a glance at the blond beside him. He isn't sure what's going on with her and Callie anymore, but he doesn't like it. Callie usually tells him everything... Or at least that's what he'd always thought.

----

They walk into the hospital nearly side-by-side, and Cristina is there waiting for them. The ER is busy, with doctors and nurses running around trying to attend to all of the different patients filling the beds. As far as they can see, though, there aren't any kids, which makes Arizona wonder why she was paged. Mark is scanning the room for any patients who might need plastic surgery, and though he finds some (as well some who might want to consider it even though they aren't injured), he doesn't see any that are so drastic that he needed to be paged.

Even so, Mark asks, "What happened? Where do we need to go?"

"Pile-up on the highway," Cristina answers offhandedly. Then she shakes her head. "You two don't need to go anywhere. You weren't paged for this."

Both attendings look at Cristina in confusion. "Then what were we paged for?" Arizona asks, biting her lip. If she isn't needed here, she really wants to go find Calliope.

"We have..." Cristina seems to be struggling for her words and this alarms Mark. Then her face hardens, and for the first time, Mark realizes that there had been fear and pain in her eyes a few moments ago. Arizona notices this too, and her eyebrows squeeze closer together. Yang sighs. "It's Callie," she finally says. "They already took her to surgery."

The color drains from their faces and Cristina swallows thickly. Mark can see the fear on Arizona's face and she can see the disbelief on his.

"What... What happened to her?" Mark manages.

"I don't know," Cristina says honestly. "She had a stab wound in her lower abdomen."

Mark nods just to let her know that he understands. The pieces start to fall into place in Arizona's mind and she hesitantly croaks out, her voice barely audible, "Where was she found?"

Cristina looks at her in surprise, caught somewhat off-guard by the seemingly random question. "Some hotel a few blocks away, I think."

"Jose," Arizona whispers, but neither of them hear her. Why hadn't she figured that out earlier? If she had, maybe Callie wouldn't be fighting for her life in the OR room right now.

She_ is_ fighting, right? Arizona runs a hand through her hair and Mark wipes a hand down the stubble growing on his chin. Both want to know how she's doing, what the chances of survival are, how long it will be before she gets out of surgery, what the side effects could be, how bad the injuries are, exactly what surgery they're performing...

But they are both too afraid of the answers to ask. What if she's barely hanging on? What if there's little to no chance she'll survive? What if she gets out, but never wakes up? What if she can't remember them, or suffers brain injuries, or has some other sort of problem? As far as they know, anything could happen. Anything could _be_ happening.

"I don't know a whole lot," Cristina admits. Mark can tell this is scaring her, too, even though she's trying to hide it. "But if you want, I can tell you what I do know..."

Mark nods numbly. Arizona is practically burning a hole in the ground with her stare and he wonders if she even knows Cristina was just talking. The younger doctor starts walking towards the waiting room and they follow. Mark wraps an arm around Arizona's shoulders and pulls her close as he wills the tears not to fall. She already has tears streaming down her face, and the last thing he needs is to start crying, too. If he started now, he doesn't know if he'd be able to stop. This is his best friend who has her life in the balance.

"She lost quite a bit of blood," Cristina says once they've all sat down. This, being a doctor, she can do. She can pretend she isn't talking about one of her friends and just be a doctor, talking to the family of a patient. Or she can pretend that they're just practicing, pretending that something is wrong with Callie so they can get better at what they do. Like she, Meredith, George, Izzie, and Alex used to do. This is her comfort zone. "She had a punctured lung..." Cristina takes a deep breath as the images of Callie lying on the bed they pulled out of the ambulance rush back to the front of her mind. Maybe this won't be as easy as she thought. "She was unconscious when she got here, so I don't know about brain damage... They took her back for exploratory surgery probably about half an hour ago..."

Somewhere through that, Arizona buried her head in Mark's shoulder as the tears continued to pour out of her eyes. How did this happen to her Calliope? She knows it was Jose, it _had_ to be Jose. That had to be what the address was for. She should have stopped her. She should have known better than to let Calliope walk out of the hospital and go there. Arizona had had a bad feeling as soon as she read the address on that slip of paper. She should have found some way to make Calliope stay at the hospital for just a little while longer. She could have done it, she could have found a way...

Mark holds Arizona tightly beside him, almost afraid of letting go. Tears are stinging in his eyes and it takes everything he has not to let them run down his face. He should have paged Callie when he first got off, not when he got home. Maybe those twenty minutes or so would have made a difference. That amount of time could have saved her life. If only he had thought about it, maybe she wouldn't be here right now, at least not like this. _They _wouldn't be here right now. There would be no worrying, no fear, no tears. They could move on with their lives, have just another boring night in after work.

"I'll go see if there are any updates," Cristina offers. She doesn't do too well in situations like these and watching them, watching how this is effecting them is making her think about it more and more and she can't do that. She has to try to stay detached. She has to stay professional and calm.

Mark nods. "Thank you," he whispers, his voice cracking. Cristina nods at him before leaving, and once she has left the room the tears start to slide down his face. There are a ton of other people in the room, no doubt relatives of the patients in the ER or other patients scattered around the hospital, but he doesn't know a single one of them and so he doesn't care. His shoulders start to shake as he sobs, and Arizona grabs a fistful of his shirt in her hand. For some reason, it comforts him to know that Arizona is right here beside him. He hates that she has to go through this, but it's nice to know somebody's there, even if she _is_ crying just as much as he is.

----

_The little boy laughs at her as she spins around. "Aunt __Callie__," he whines through his laughter, "You aren't supposed to do it like _that_!" She grins despite the pang in her heart as he calls her Aunt Callie and crouches down to her knees. He has Jose's - Aria's? - hair and skin color, but those big brown eyes are definitely from her._

_"Well how did you mean it then?" she asks, and she follows him obediently as he grabs her hand and pulls her further into the living room. He instructs her on how to do it the 'right way,' and she can't help but smile at how adorable he is. Why did she give this all up?  
_

----

Tears are still rolling down Mark's face when he realizes that Arizona has cried herself to sleep on his lap. She can't be very comfortable, and he won't be surprised if she has neck pains when she wakes up, but she finally looks peaceful. Her face is red from crying, and even in her sleep she doesn't look happy, but at least she isn't dealing with the pain right now. He hopes she doesn't have to wake up soon; he doesn't want her to have to keep feeling this pain. He might not show it that well, or very often, but he really does care for Arizona. She may have ended up hurting Callie, but he can tell that she still loves her. He can tell that they still love_ each other_.

He finds himself absentmindedly rubbing her arm and back. He's gotten lost in his thoughts again, and he can't force himself to think about anything else even though that's all he wants to do. He can't help but think about Callie, only a few hallways away with a stab wound, and how he's just sitting here, useless. There isn't a damn thing he can do to help save his friend's life.

She can't die. Mark won't let her. What is he supposed to do without her? Who would be there to tell him, when it starts to happen again, that his man-whoring ways are wrong, but still not judge him on it? Who would be there to actually _understand? _She is probably the only person he has ever met that truly understands what he feels. Derek is a good friend, sure, but he doesn't get it. Derek has always been the mature, marrying kind. Callie understands why he needs the sex, no strings attached, because she's been there before. Who will be there to yell at him when he's starting to act _too _immature? Who will be there to gossip with him at the lunch table, or make fun of random people walking by in the halls? Who will talk him out of the slump he gets in after a break-up? He's gotten mad at her and he's tried to push her away so many times, but she always comes back and pushes her way back into his life. How many people would try that hard, especially for someone like him?

He needs his best friend. He needs his work wife.

----

_Her dad pushes open her bedroom door. Usually she would be mad at him for not knocking, but she can see the tears building up in his eyes and his shoulders are slumped forward._

_"What's wrong, Daddy?" Callie asks, the worry starting to build up in her. A million different scenarios are running through her head at a million miles a minute, but none of them are anywhere near what comes out of his mouth._

_"It's Brandon, Calliope," he says, and his voice sounds smaller than she has ever heard it. "He was hit by a car. We need... We need to get to the hospital."_

----

Mark lets a few more tears slide down his cheeks before he sees Cristina walking down the hall towards him. He thinks about waking Arizona up, and is still trying to decide when Cristina confirms it.

"She might want to hear this."

_"No, don't leave me to die here_  
_ Help me survive here_  
_ Alone, don't remember, remember"_  
_"_Evil Angel_" - Breaking Benjamin_


	11. Tell Me

Disclaimer: Not mine...  
Author's Note: Thank you to everyone who reviewed on the last chapter! I really love to hear your feedback, it makes my day. (:

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 11 : Tell Me**

Mark nods, gently shaking the blond surgeon until she starts to wake up. She lets out a yawn, and briefly wonders where she is and what she's doing there, until the memories come back and hit her head-on.

"What did you find out?" Mark asks, his voice hoarse.

"Well, she... She's nearly out of surgery," Cristina says, and it's then that he realizes just how long ago she left. "They managed to fix the punctured lung. They're going to have her hooked up to oxygen and a heart monitor... She had a few cracked ribs and a concussion. The knife had been moved a few times, so the wound was bigger than it should have been. Derek said we won't know if she has any brain injuries until she wakes up..."

"Can't they get a scan of her brain?"

"They will, and he thinks she'll be fine, but it will be easier to tell once she wakes up. Not everything shows up in the scans, Mark, you know that."

Arizona runs a hand through her hair. "And how long will that be, Cristina?"

The younger doctor bites her lip for a brief second. "There's no way to tell."

----

_Jose grabs her roughly by the shoulder and turns her around. "Where the hell do you think you're going?" he demands gruffly. She chances a glance out the window, feeling the defeat settle over her as her mother's car leaves the driveway and disappears around the corner._

_"Nowhere," she whispers quietly. She wishes she had the guts to fight back. She wishes she had the nerve to tear away from him. She's fourteen years old. This has been going on long enough. She's had time to work up the bravery to confront him. Why can't she just _do _it?_

_"That's what I thought."_

_The back of his hand collides with her cheek, and the first thing that crosses her mind is, _'how am I going to explain the red mark this time?'_ Then his fist sinks into her stomach and all she can think about is getting air in her lungs. She falls to her knees and bites back all sounds of pain. She may not be strong enough to end this, but she won't let herself be so weak as to let him know how much he hurts her._

_His knee lands beside her shoulder and his hand comes to rest gently on her stomach. She swallows and lets her eyes close tightly. She knows exactly what will be coming next. The house is silent. They're the only ones here. This is what always comes next._

_It's only a matter of time, she reminds herself. He'll do it, then it'll be over. She just has to wait it out, and she can do that._

----

Cristina shifts her weight from one foot to the other. "Once they have her all set up in her room, you should be able to go see her."

"Do you know what room she'll be in?" Mark asks hopefully. He can feel Arizona shaking beside him and it makes his heart break that much more.

"I'll take you there," Cristina offers. She pauses for a moment, looking briefly unsure, then starts to walk. Mark and Arizona follow her closely, Arizona once again wrapped under Mark's arm. By this point the contact is for his own comfort, not just her's, but she isn't complaining. Cristina stops for a short second, almost as if she's unsure about whether she wants to continue, but then she starts again. He's about to tell her just to give them the room number, because they know this hospital just as well as she does and would know exactly where it was, but then he realizes that she must want to see Callie, too. But Cristina isn't known for her caring nature or awesome social skills; she needs some sort of excuse.

They reach the room as the nurses finish up. Arizona rushes in almost as soon as the nurses allow them to enter, taking only a short, short moment to prepare herself for what lies beyond the doorway. Cristina steps into the room, looking professional as always, and checks Callie's chart. Mark would think that she was just there on official business, to do her job, if it weren't for the way she awkwardly puts a hand on the edge of the bed and whispers something. He can't make out her words, and he doubts Arizona can - if she was even paying attention - but that's okay. They weren't meant for him to hear, anyway. They were meant for Callie.

Then Cristina walks out, barely brushing against him as she goes, and Mark can almost swear that there is pain and sadness in her eyes. But then again, there is pain and sadness in his eyes, too, and Arizona's. There was even sadness in one of those nurse's eyes.

Mark remains in the doorway, silently watching the scene in front of him. Arizona is holding Callie's hand in her own, tears streaming down her face. He can't tell if her eyes are open or not, if she's looking at Callie or not, but he would understand either way. He hasn't gathered up the strength to look at Callie yet, and honestly, he doesn't want to. He doesn't want to see her looking like a patient, like a victim. He doesn't want to see her hurt, attacked, beat. He doesn't want to see what that bastard, whoever it is, did to her.

But at the same time, he wants nothing more than _to _look at her. To see her lying there, breathing, sleeping, _living. _To see with his own two eyes that she hasn't left him yet.

Mark forces his gaze to move from Arizona to Callie. His heart skips a beat and the tears sprout back to his eyes as the image settles in his memory. Never has he seen Callie look so pale. Never has he seen her look so small, so fragile. The sheets are covering the wound and her ribs, and for that he is grateful; he doesn't want to know what that looks like. He doesn't think he could handle it. There are enough reminders of pain on the visible parts of her body.

He steps into the room and scoots a chair over to the bed on the opposite side of Arizona. He brushes a strand of hair out of Callie's face, holding back a small sob as it threatens to escape him. He can see where bruises are starting to form on her jaw, around her neck, and along her shoulder and it makes him wonder how many others she has. How many she has hidden beneath the blankets.

"It's gonna be alright," he whispers, more to himself than anyone else, but Arizona nods anyway.

He just can't tell if she believes it or if she's as unsure as he is.

----

_She walks slowly into the hospital behind her dad. She doesn't want to be here, she doesn't want to hear what the doctor has to say. She wraps her arms around herself in an attempt to stop her shaking, but she knows it won't help any. Nothing can, not right now. Nothing except good, good news._

_Brandon is too young for this. He shouldn't have to be going through this. No eight-year-old should have to be faced with death. It isn't right, it isn't fair, it isn't..._

_A young doctor walks up to meet them. Aria, Damien, and Callie's mother are already standing in the waiting room. Damien has his arms around a sobbing Aria, and when Carlos and Callie reach them, Carlos wraps his arm around his teary-eyed wife as well. Callie breathes deeply, standing behind the other four, trying to get a grip on herself. She can't break down, not now, because there's still the chance..._

_The doctor stops in front of them. He runs a hand through his light blond hair while gripping at his scrub cap with his other hand. He seems to be trying to compose himself, trying to find the words to say, but Callie's family has never been known for their patience. She almost feels bad for the poor man as he gets bombarded by questions._

_"Is he okay?" Aria chokes out._

_"When can we take him home?" Mrs. Torres asks._

_"How bad is it?" Carlos demands.  
_

_"What room is he in?" Damien chimes in last._

_But Callie can't get any words out. She stares at the surgeon's face and she already knows. She knows those eyes, that frown, that awkward shifting of weight, the way he's messing with his hair, the grip on his scrub cap, the way he can't find the right words... It can all mean only one thing. She swallows thickly because he hasn't said one word yet she knows the answer to every single question they just asked him._

_All she needs is for him to confirm it. She feels like she's been waiting for years before he finally speaks up._

_"We did everything we could..."_

----

Arizona has finally cried herself to sleep again. Her head is now resting on the bed, her hand still firmly grasping Callie's. Mark knows she will be in for a whole lot of neck pain in the morning, but he can't bring himself to move her.

He wishes he could sleep. He wishes he could start to feel tired. But he doesn't think he would be able to fall asleep right now, no matter how hard he tried.

He breaks his gaze away from Callie. It doesn't look like she's going to be waking up any time soon; it's already nearly one in the morning and she hasn't even stirred. Not that he's seen, at least, and unless he dozed off once or twice without realizing it, he's been watching her the whole time.

He presses a kiss to her forehead as he gets up. He's been sitting for hours and he really just needs to stretch his legs. He wants to get away from all this, if only a for a few minutes.

When he leaves the room, his plan is to go get a cup of coffee. But instead his legs take him to the nurses' desk, and he finds a few of the nurses who helped with Callie. He talks to them for a few minutes before he finds out that nobody called her parents. He's surprised and pissed and even though he knows it's a tough part of the job, and that because they know Callie it's just that much harder, they still should have done it. And usually he would have Callie to calm him down. She would yell at him for screaming at the nurses like he does. She would smack him for being such an ass. But he doesn't have her to do that right now, and so he yells and screams and insults them until one gets so scared she looks like she's about to cry. They promise him they'll call her parents as Derek grabs him by the shoulders and forces him away.

"What the hell was that, Mark?" Derek demands, and Mark just finds himself getting madder when he sees Derek cross his arms. That is something Richard Webber would do. That is _Webber's_ 'disciplining' arm cross.

Mark shakes his head and pushes his way past Derek. He vaguely hears Derek yelling something about "watching his act," or something, but honestly Mark is too angry to pay much attention. Derek doesn't get to judge him, to discipline him, to look down on him. Those nurses were the incompetent ones. They are the ones Derek should be disciplining. Not him.

He pulls out his cell phone and dials a familiar number. When nobody answers, he hits the coffee vending machine and tries again.

One thought keeps running through his head: _Why did this have to happen? What did she do to deserve this?_

Mark doesn't even think to give the old man walking by the small snack room a second glance.

_"So tell me_,  
_ Tell me that I'm not all alone_  
_ And everything's alright__"  
"_Tell Me_" - Story of the Year_


	12. Not Quite Alone

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, I still own nothing. All I've got is Season One on DVD and not quite enough money to buy any other seasons. Boo.  
A/N: Sorry that this update took so long, I was experiencing a little bit of writer's block. For this story, at least. I got about a million ideas based off last Thursday's episode and I wrote at least five different one-shots for it (only one of which I posted). I couldn't quite get my mind to think about this story, it was too busy. Haha. Anyways, I hope you enjoy. (:

* * *

**The Scars To Prove It  
Chapter 12 : Not Quite Alone**

"Does it look like I give a fuck about the visiting hours?!"

The shouting outside slowly wakes Arizona up. She rubs her neck in an attempt to relax the tight muscles. Sleeping like that was not the best idea she'd ever had, that was for sure. Why was she sleeping like that, anyway? She's about to nudge Callie - she can feel the brunette's hand in her's - but then she glances at the sleeping woman and the memories start rushing back to her.

She holds back the tears that threaten to fall and runs a hand through her hair. It doesn't look like Callie has woken up yet.

"Just tell me the damn room number!" the woman shouts again.

Arizona looks towards the doorway, even though she knows she won't be able to see the nurse's desk from here. The voice sounds vaguely familiar, but who does she know that would be screaming at the nurses like that? Nobody she knows would have any reason to, except maybe some of the doctors that want to see Callie, and they would be able to just walk in. It wouldn't be a patient's parent, either, because they're nowhere near the PEDs floor.

"Page Shepherd, then," the woman says, challenge in her voice. Though she is no longer screaming, Arizona can still hear the anger and annoyance in her tone. The nurse is still quiet enough that Arizona can't make out much of anything except for the rising level of frustration in every word. Well, it _is_ a little after three in the morning. Arguing is probably the last thing on that nurse's to-do list.

"Because I said so!" the woman again yells. Arizona can hear the nurse's voice before a brief silence. Then there's a thud, followed by the clicking of high heels.

Now the nurse raises her voice. "Ma'am, you aren't allowed to do that!" she all but shrieks.

Arizona blinks. She breaks her contact with Callie's hand, gently presses a kiss to the brunette's forehead, and slowly stands. Her muscles are sore and tense and she takes a minute to stretch them out before walking towards the nurse's desk to see what all the fuss is about.

She must have missed something since the last thing she heard because by the time she gets out there Derek is rushing down the hallway. He slows when he sees both women behind the nurse's desk. Arizona stops beside him, tilting her head to the side slightly as she watches the scene in front of her unfold.

A redhead is trying to push the nurse away from her with one arm while the other arm types a name into the computer. The nurse is trying to get a hold of the redhead's shoulder, arm, _something, _to pull her away. She's shouting and grunting, struggling to get the redhead away, until Derek decides to speak up with a soft chuckle.

"She's okay," he says, then runs a hand through his hair and focuses his gaze on the woman. "Addison, what are you doing?" he asks with an exasperated sigh.

"She wouldn't tell me which room Callie was in, so I decided I'd find out for myself," the redhead replies matter-of-factly, turning to face Derek. There is a red tint to her cheeks and Arizona isn't sure if she's blushing or just out-of-breath.

Now that she can get a good look at her, Arizona realizes that she does know this woman. She's none other than Addison Montgomery, Callie's best friend (beside Mark, of course). A small smile crosses her face as she thinks about what Addison just did. It'll definitely make for a good, funny story, when Calliope's ready to hear about it.

"She's in Room..." Derek stops, trying to figure out which room number it was. Then he remembers Arizona. "Well... I'm sure Robbins will be going back soon," he says. He glances at Arizona, looking for confirmation. "Maybe she could show you?"

Arizona nods. "It's right back here..."

Addison straightens out her jacket, nods, sends the nurse a quick glare, murmurs a small "thank you" to Derek, and walks around the counter to pick her purse up off the floor. She then follows Arizona, and they walk the short walk in silence. Arizona is lost in her mind and Addison is trying to prepare herself for what she's about to see. She knows it's a futile attempt, but she's never been one to accept defeat and she tries anyway.

They reach the doorway and Arizona hesitates, not wanting to see Callie like that again. Addison watches her with worry and care in her eyes. Arizona nearly says something but decides against it, instead taking a deep breath and walking slowly into the room. Addison follows, close on the blond's heels. Miranda Bailey and Meredith Grey are standing there when they walk in, checking to make sure everything is running smoothly.

Addison's eyes rest on Callie and she sucks air in through her teeth. The noise gains her the attention of both Arizona and Meredith. Bailey continues to mutter while checking on all of Callie's vitals, and soon their attention is all on the short woman by the bed. Addison is glad for the distraction; she's having as hard of a time seeing Callie like this as Arizona and Mark did.

"...so of course it had to be you," Bailey is saying, either not knowing that everyone can hear her or simply not caring. "You're always the one who tells everyone everything, you're so honest... You really get yourself in deep sometimes. But at the same time you don't tell anyone anything. I mean, six years ago, where were you? And damn, you're the one always getting into it with everyone... Don't think I didn't see you with that redhead nurse today, Callie."

Wait, what? Arizona's head snaps from Bailey to Callie and back again. She misses a few moments of Bailey's ramble as her head reels over what she said. Callie and a redheaded nurse were fighting? (She was assuming it was Amber - how many other redheaded nurses are there, especially that have any interest in fighting with Callie?) When had that happened?

"...shouldn't have happened to you. You aren't as rough as you try to make yourself out to be, Torres, and don't think that nobody knows that." They all feel guilty for listening in, but not guilty enough to stop. "You stand up for people all the time. You understand most of the patients around here that everybody else doesn't. Who else would've convinced Sloan to settle down? Who else would've been able to talk me through the third date?" They almost wonder if Bailey even remembers they're standing only a few feet away, because by now she's done checking her condition and is actually leaning against the bed, speaking to Callie. "You gotta hang in there, Torres," she says softly, placing a hand on Callie's lower arm. "I don't have a whole lot of friends here, you know, but you... You're a friend. Hell, I even hugged you!" She lets out a strained chuckle, then whispers, "Come on, Torres."

Bailey gives Callie a slightly awkward pat on the arm before turning around. She notices the three shocked women in the back of the room and her spine straightens of its own accord as she gives them a curt nod and walks out the door.

When Bailey has disappeared down the hall, Addison stares at the wall. "Bailey's dating?" she asks no-one in particular, partly because she's shocked and curious and partly because it's the only excuse to stay rooted in this spot, the only defense mechanism she has left.

An equally-shocked Meredith Grey beside her stares at the same wall. "Bailey hugged Callie?" she asks, purely shocked and impatient. She wants to leave but Arizona and Addison are blocking the doorway now. Arizona nods, somewhat glad for the distraction. But then it all leads back to Callie.

"She's done a lot," the blond whispers, stepping further into the room. Addison nods, walking in as far as Arizona does, and Meredith takes this chance to escape through the opening.

Arizona takes her seat by Callie's side, leaving Addison standing at the foot of the bed awkwardly until she notices the chair at the other side. Slowly, and somewhat cautiously - like she isn't sure if she's allowed - Addison sits in the chair, silently placing her purse on the ground as she does so.

Arizona takes Callie's hand into her own, rubbing gentle circles onto the soft skin. She can hear Addison's whispers, but only a few sentences make sense to her. Most seem like inside jokes and codewords and other than that, it just seems like pure rambling that probably wouldn't even make sense to Callie if she were awake. Heck, Arizona could record this and play it back to Addison later and it would more than likely confuse even the redhead. But the blond can hear the emotion in Addison's voice and she can't help but feel glad about how many people care about Calliope. Callie has more friends than Arizona thinks she realizes. She's touched more lives than she knows. She has helped more people through more things than she's aware of.

After all, Addison took the first flight she could find at one in the morning to get here. Bailey was nearly in tears a minute ago. Cristina had pain in her eyes. Meredith even looked sad, and she doesn't know Callie all that well. Mark's falling apart just as much as Arizona is, yelling at nurses, avoiding friends...

If that isn't caring, she doesn't know what is. And those are the only people who really know right now. Of course there's Derek and Owen, who Arizona is sure came in when she was asleep. She doesn't know how many people came in while she was sleeping. Probably a lot more than she's assuming. And she'll be damned if she lets Jose get away with this.

Then Addison stands and walks quickly out of the room, her heels making an uneven beat against the floor. Her head is down and Arizona watches silently. She has never seen Addison walk with her head down like that; as far as Arizona could tell, Addison always walked with her head held high against the world. Something tells the blond that she should get up and go after her, but Arizona stays seated, her hand only tightening around Callie's.

A murmur of voices comes from out in the hall, Addison and some man. Arizona can't focus on the voice enough to tell who.

Then she feels something move. She furrows her eyebrows together, her grip on Callie's hand loosening, when she felt it again. Callie's hand moving underneath her own. Until the brunette was grasping tighter and tighter onto Arizona's.

The blond chokes out a strangled cry of, "Addison! Mark!" But really, she'd be happy with anybody who comes.

Both rush in there and Arizona is speechless by the time they do. Tears of excitement are falling down her face.

A small groan escapes Callie's throat before brown eyes flutter open and Bailey and Meredith rush into the room.

_"I was inside, looking outside_  
_ The millions of faces,__ but still I'm alone_  
_ Waiting, hours of waiting__, paying a penance_  
_ I was longing for home_  
_ I'm looking out for the two of us_  
_ I hope we'll be here__ when they're through with us"  
"_Long, Long Way From Home_" - Foreigner_


	13. We Build Then We Break

Disclaimer: I own it just as much as I did the last time I updated. Which means, not at all.  
A/N: Okay, so, here's the moment most of you have been waiting for! You may be able to tell that I don't like Alex. At all. But that's okay, right?

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 13 : We Build Then We Break**

The first thing Callie does after she gets a glance at Arizona is start fighting against the tube down her throat, and the first thing Bailey does is get Meredith to help take it out. The tube is quickly replaced by an oxygen mask, which Callie coughs into a few times before the oxygen starts to take effect. Her breathing starts to slow to a normal pace, and she lets her brown eyes flutter back open to take in the scene around her.

Bailey and Meredith are standing on one side of the bed. Bailey is checking her vitals and glancing through her chart, but she does it so many times and for so long that Callie isn't sure if she's really doing it or just trying to keep herself busy. Meredith is looking around awkwardly, looking over Bailey's shoulder at the chart a few times. Callie is trying to decide whether Big Grey is feeling out-of-place, or doesn't want to be there, or just doesn't know how to react, but cuts that short when the hand in hers finally registers in her brain.

She turns her head to look at Arizona but stops when Mark and Addison meet her eyes. Mark has his arms wrapped around himself, and though it looks like it has been a while since it happened, Callie can make out the lines of tear stains on his cheeks. His hair is messy, sticking up in random places, and his shoulders are sagging, but there's still a grin planted on his face and a spark in his eyes. Addison is standing right beside him, her red, puffy eyes focused on a spot on the wall. Fresh tear lines stain her face and the remnants of tears linger in her eyes; every once in a while she sniffles, letting Callie know that it really hasn't been more than a minute or two since the redhead was crying. Yet her arms are crossed and she's standing as tall and straight as she can, her head up, and Callie knows she's trying to be strong. She's trying to make up for all the weakness that she's showing.

"Addie..." Callie chokes out, moving the oxygen mask so she can talk, "I'm okay."

Addison's eyes slowly move their gaze from the wall to Callie. The brunette watches as fresh tears start to pool in her eyes and Addison holds them back before quickly swiping at them with the back of her sleeve. "I know," she whispers, forcing a small smile to her lips. "I know."

Callie nods, and squeezes the hand in hers. She feels Arizona squeeze back and turns to look at her. She's laughing through her tears, which, paired with the gigantic smile on her face, lets Callie know she is now crying out of joy and not sadness. The death grip Arizona has on her hand is almost making her wince, but she does her best to replace it with a weak smile. It doesn't hurt as much as the wound in her abdomen, and besides, nobody needs to know she's hurting.

It's almost like Bailey reads her mind because the short surgeon is soon clearing her throat, demanding the attention of everyone in the small room. "She's going to need her rest," Bailey says when they all look at her, much more comfortable now that she can fall into her role as a doctor. "We'll give you some pain meds," she adds, now talking to Callie more so than the others. "They'll help you sleep and take care of that wound."

"I don't need any--" Callie starts to protest, but Bailey cuts her off with a shake of her head.

"Torres," she says sternly, "you got stabbed. Pain comes with that. You're getting the medicine, whether you like it or not."

Callie sighs. "Fine," she grumbles. A part of her is glad that Bailey is making her take them, yet another part of her feels weak because of it.

Bailey nods at Meredith and the younger doctor makes her way out of the room to get the medicine. Arizona absentmindedly rubs circles on Callie's hand. Mark now has an arm around Addison's shoulder, and it seems like Addison has once again gained control over her emotions.

Meredith comes back with the pain meds and starts to give them to Callie, per Bailey's orders. Callie really just wants to talk to Arizona, but she won't be able to do that if she's half asleep. She wants to know why the blond waited for her. (_Maybe she really does still care?_) She wants to know if Arizona knows anything about Jose. (_Does everybody know now? Did they get him?_) She wants to know how long she's been out. (_A couple of hours, or a few days?_)

She hasn't noticed the people are filing out until Mark turns from the doorway and promises, "I'll be back in a bit, Cal." It's followed by Addison softly saying, "We're gonna let you sleep for a while..."

Callie nods as she slowly gets pulled back to reality. She's starting to feel the effects of the drugs, although she feels it more in the form of drowsiness than pain relief. As Addison takes another step towards the doorway, Callie calls, "Addison?" The redhead turns around slowly, question in her eyes. Callie smiles at her softly. "Thank you for coming."

Addison shakes her head as a lop-sided smile graces her lips. "You don't have to thank me," she says. "I'm here whenever you need me. Always." With that, both of Callie's best friends disappear into the hallway.

Arizona sinks into the chair by the bed as Callie turns to look at her. Callie doesn't have the energy or the strength to talk about 'them' right now; instead, she swallows thinly and chooses another important topic. "Jose... Did they...?" the brunette asks slowly, but Arizona shakes her head and Callie stops talking.

"I have no idea where he is," Arizona tells her honestly.

Callie sighs. "I shouldn't have gone. It was a stupid idea... I should have known that... That something would happen..." She gasps for oxygen, hating how few words she is able to get out before needing more air.

"Hey." Arizona's voice commands her attention, and Callie's gaze moves back to her obediently. "It's not your fault, Calliope," she says firmly. "There was no way you could have known something like that would happen. Okay?"

"Okay," Callie whispers, but both are fully aware that she's still blaming herself. Because the thoughts of, _what if he tries something? _had indeed crossed Callie's mind. She _did _know that there was the possibility of something like this happening. She just ignored the signs because she was too afraid of the other option.

"You should try to get some rest," Arizona suggests. Callie wants to protest but she feels the sleep starting to settle over her, so she simply nods. She puts her head back against the pillows and tightens her grip on Arizona's hand as her eyes flutter closed.

----

After about an hour and a half, Arizona leaves for breakfast. It's still early and there are very few people in the cafeteria, but she spots Mark and Addison sitting silently at one of the corner tables and she joins them. They glance up at her as she sits down, Addison giving her a small, albeit forced, smile and Mark a slow nod of acknowledgment. They eat in silence for minutes on end, until Addison decides she's tired of it. "How's she doing?" she asks Arizona, not moving her gaze from the food on her tray and wishing that she could have come up with some better topic to talk about. Something happier.

"She was sleeping when I left," Arizona answers, watching the redhead in front of her carefully. Addison cares for Callie, she knows that; she just wishes there was some way to make this easier on her. On all of them, including herself. "She'll pull through," she adds, noticing she even has the slightest doubts inside herself, "she's str--" She stops midway through her sentence, dropping her fork onto her tray, as salt-and-pepper gray hair from behind Addison meets her vision.

The sudden stop in Arizona's words and the clanging of silverware against the plate causes Addison to look up. "Arizona?"

"That's him," she whispers after a few moments of silence. Jose meets her gaze and not long after he pushes his way out the cafeteria door.

"Who?" Addison asks, confusion evident in her tone as she watches the man exit the room.

"Jose. The man who... He did that to Calliope."

That's all Mark needs. He pushes away from the table, sending his chair tumbling to the ground, and walks with controlled, determined steps towards the door. Addison and Arizona are close on his heels, nearly walking beside him on they enter the hallway. Rage radiates off him, and Arizona can see the fury on even Addison's features; she wonders what she looks like, how angry she seems. Because God knows she's as pissed as they are, if not more.

They catch up to Jose only a few halls away from Callie's room. Mark turns to Arizona and gets a quick confirmation about the man's identity (she assumes that he doesn't want to attack the wrong person) then rushes to reach the older man. He grabs Jose by the shoulder and forces him around. "Can I help you?" Jose asks calmly as he inspects Mark with cold eyes.

Mark makes a noise that could almost be considered a growl as he shoves Jose against the wall. Jose lets out a grunt as his head is shoved forward by the impact and tries to keep his appearance calm as Mark shouts into his face. "You bastard! What the hell are you doing here? Don't you think you've done enough already?!" His fist sinks into Jose's stomach as his other arm keeps him pinned to the wall. "You could have killed her!" Another punch. "She's in that hospital bed right now because of _you_!" This time his fist connects with Jose's jaw. "And you have the fucking _nerve _to walk in here?!" Arizona can hear the breath leave Jose as Mark hits him in the stomach again.

"It would be... Best for you... To let me go," Jose manages to get out between ragged breaths. None of them miss the dangerous glint in his eyes.

"Sloan!" a voice cries out, followed by footsteps rushing down the hallway. Alex, Jackson, and Owen run to pull Mark away from Jose, but Addison and Arizona do their best to keep them away. But three men against two women?

"I will make sure you never have a chance in Peds, Karev!" Arizona yells as Alex runs past her and she struggles to keep Jackson back. Alex spares her a small glance, but continues on anyway, quickly followed by a now-free Jackson.

"Don't!" Addison pleads with Owen, managing to kick her high heels off at his shins and doing her best to push the man back. She's strong, but no match for him; she's trying to hold his arms back, trying to tackle him, and trying to push him away, but nothing is working like she wants it to. He breaks free of her grasp after muttering something about having a bruise from her "damn shoes" and rushes to help the younger two doctors get Mark away from Jose. Addison and Arizona keep trying to pry them off Mark but all their attempts fail miserably.

The three men get Mark away, but not without their own injuries. Alex is sporting a busted lip and holding his nose, trying to stop the blood as it pours out, and Owen has the startings of a black eye (Arizona saw Jose attempt a few punches, and briefly wonders if Mark or Jose gave it to him). Jackson and Owen are still holding onto Mark as he struggles and Alex yells at a nurse for some tissues.

"I think you should leave," Jackson calmly tells Jose, having only a little difficulty getting his words out through his panting and struggling with Mark.

"Go to hell!" Mark shouts, earning a glare from Jose. The older man starts to make his way towards Mark, but is pushed away by Alex at the last second. Blood gets on Jose's shirt and he glares at Alex, just as a nurse hands him a bundle of tissues. Jose coughs, struggling to hold his breath as he grasps onto his hurt stomach.

"I think you should go," Jackson repeats, this time firmer.

"I want to see Calliope first."

"The hell you will!" Mark yells.

"You aren't getting anywhere near Callie," Addison agrees, crossing her arms.

Arizona stands silently, carefully examining Jose. She bites her lip, a little scared of her own feelings. She has never hated someone this much. The words tumble out of her mouth to Owen and Jackson and she isn't sure if it makes her an awful person for saying them. "You shouldn't have pulled Mark away."

Owen and Jackson snap their heads up to look at Arizona, and even Alex looks shocked. "What did you say?" Owen asks slowly, not sure if he heard her correctly.

"You shouldn't have made Mark stop. You should have let him finish."

None of them have really thought of Arizona that way. They have never thought that the kind, perky pediatric surgeon would be capable of thinking like that. Jackson certainly hadn't, and though she had had her "brick-throwing" phase with Alex, he didn't think she was actually capable of wanting to see someone beat like that. Owen was shocked, but he would be the first of the three to admit that he didn't know all that much about Arizona. _What had this man done to make _Arizona Robbins_ so upset?_ was running through each of their minds. Addison and Mark weren't as surprised - their thoughts didn't differ too much from hers.

"He would have killed him," Owen says finally, as if she didn't know.

Arizona meets his gaze evenly. "Exactly."

Jackson raises his eyebrows and lets out a puff of air, followed by a soft, "Wow."

Jose turns to look at Arizona, his eyes narrow slits. "You're the girlfriend, aren't you?" he asks, the disgust evident in his tone.

"Yes." So maybe they aren't exactly 'together' right now. They're close enough, right? There's no need to go into specifics, and certainly not with this man.

"You're the one who--"

"What's all of this about?" Alex demands, handing his bloodied tissues back over to the nurse and rejoining the group. Owen and Jackson have released their grip on Mark, but have kept their hands on his arms, ready in case he decides to strike again.

"He's the bastard who hurt Callie," Mark spits.

Mark feels Owen tense up beside him and Addison watches as Alex stands up a little bit straighter, his eyes darkening. "You need to leave," Owen says coldly. This completely changes the situation.

"I'll show him the way out," Mark offers, his fists clenching in anticipation.

"Yeah, in a body bag," Jackson mutters.

"Avery."

The young surgeon looks around Mark at Owen. "Yeah?"

"Show him the way out... You're the least likely to kill him."

Jackson nods, stepping back from Mark and then towards Jose. He lightly touches the man on the shoulder, but that's enough to set him off. Jose twists and sends a punch flying his way. Jackson barely dodges it, feeling it connect briefly with his ear. Mark starts making his way towards Jose, but Owen grabs him and pulls him back. They struggle with each other until they fall to the ground. Alex takes the chance to go up to Jose, who is still trying to fight with Jackson. The surgeon is dodging the older man's attacks as best as he can. Alex grabs Jose from behind, but he is quickly pushed off.

Neither Arizona or Addison are sure how, but Alex soon ends up stumbling backwards, a hand pressed to his jaw while Jackson roughly hold Jose's wrists behind his back. Jackson pushes Jose down the hallway, muttering something far from nice into the man's ear.

Hunt stands when Jackson and Jose disappear around the corner, allowing Mark to get up as well. "You shouldn't have stopped me," Mark grumbles as he wipes dirt off his shirt.

Owen eyes him warily. "Yes, we should have." He runs a hand through his hair and sighs. "You okay over there, Karev?" he asks, catching a glance of Alex, who is still rubbing his jaw.

"I'm fine," Alex mutters just loud enough for them to hear.

Arizona dips her head. "I wish he was dead," she admits in a whisper to Addison.

The redhead wraps her arm around Arizona in a comforting half-hug. "I think we all do," she whispers softly into the blond's ear.

_"I don't know you_  
_But I know what you did to her_  
_ She told me and _  
_I happen to believe her too_  
_ They will be three steps behind_  
_ You will not know what's got you..."  
"_We Build Then We Break_" - The Fray_


	14. Just a Matter of Time

Disclaimer: Still not mine, sorry.  
A/N: I am so, so, _so _sorry for the wait! I haven't had much time to write, and then someone stole my iPod - which is my major inspiration - so I haven't been able to think. I can't survive without my music. I can't do my math homework, or read, and it's harder to write, and it's harder to sleep, and I get bored easier... Heh... Anyway, this is the next chapter. And this week is spring break, so I really hope to get the next chapter or two up soon. Again, very sorry for the wait, and I hope this doesn't disappoint...

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It**  
**Chapter 14 : Just a Matter of Time**

A pager goes off and all five surgeons automatically check their waists. Owen groans as he realizes the loud chirping is coming from his pager. He runs a hand down his face as a nurse steps over to them, and he's about to step away to answer his page, groaning something about "Avery," when the nurse speaks.

"Dr. Hunt," she says, almost unsurely, "I think Dr. Avery took that man down to the police officers who were waiting to speak to Dr. Torres."

Owen looks at her for a minute, then back down at his pager. Then he nods. "That would explain why Avery's paging me."

He walks away from the crowd, and Alex soon walks off after him, as his pager goes off as well.

Mark runs a hand through his hair. "Well, that was interesting," he mutters, wanting to fill the silence any way he can.

Arizona merely nods, while Addison spares him a short, "Yeah."

And minutes later, the chirping of pagers again fills the air.

-----

She stares at the doorway, watching the hallway outside without really seeing anything. Bits of light from the rising sun are starting to filter through the blinds but that only gives her enough to assume the time. She thinks that she's been asleep for about an hour or two, though she isn't sure. That's plenty of time, though, for Arizona to have gotten bored or paged, or just decide to leave. A part of her wishes, and had thought, that the blonde would have stayed. But then the other part of her - the logical, rational side - tells her that Arizona had no reason to stay, and maybe she couldn't. Sure, they kissed. But what does one simple kiss really mean in the grand scheme of things?

If not Arizona, though, Callie still expected that _somebody _would be there when she woke up. Addison or Mark. Bailey or Lexie. Teddy or Cristina. Owen or Derek. Webber or Alex. _Somebody._

But who was she trying to kid? It was only a stab wound. They see those all the time. She wasn't in a coma, she wasn't paralyzed, she hadn't suffered any brain damage. There probably weren't any complications in the surgery. Meredith Grey had nearly _died. _Izzie Stevens had to suffer through months of chemo and surgeries and hallucinations. George ended up dead, and they hadn't even known who he was for the longest time. Her situation pales in comparison. The worst of hers is a punctured lung, some stitches and bruises and a concussion. Compared to some of the crazy cases they've seen walk through those doors, and the things their own staff had been through, her stab wound sounds pretty minor. At least to her.

She wouldn't mind so much if they could just catch Jose. If he could just be put behind bars, the feeling of loneliness creeping up in her wouldn't be so bad. She wouldn't mind laying in this hospital bed if it meant that chapter of her life was over, done, sealed. For years she's been waiting for Jose to become a part of her past, not her present or her future. She wants it to _end_.

Callie watches as Cristina Yang slows to a stop and leans against the doorframe of the hospital room's door. Neither woman speaks; Callie simply watches as the younger doctor shifts her gaze from the beeping machine to Callie and back again, over and over. She doesn't know if she's supposed to be talking or not. It doesn't seem like Cristina is going to be saying anything anytime soon so Callie tries to find something break the silence, something to say that might make this a little bit less awkward.

She's in the middle of her first word when Cristina's eyes break away from hers and drift down the hallway. She has just finished saying that first word - a simple "Hey" - when Cristina turns back to look at her. Callie receives a short nod and a nearly muttered, "We need groceries," from the younger doctor before Cristina turns and walks away.

The brunette furrows her eyebrows in confusion as she continues to look at the spot that was occupied only a few seconds ago. Why the sudden disappearance? And why did she pick something so random to say? Most people would have said, "Get well soon," or "the apartment feels empty without you," or even "Is there anything I can get for you?"

Then again, Cristina Yang is not most people. Maybe "we need groceries" is her weird way of saying "get well soon." Because somebody has to buy the groceries, right? In the time she's lived there, Callie can only think of one or two times Cristina has bought the groceries.

Callie doesn't have long to read into the short sentence Cristina left her without because seconds later, there's a gentle knock on the door as Mark walks into her line of sight. He is followed closely by Addison, who gives Callie a small smile as she settles into the seat by the bed. Mark stands beside both Callie and Addison, and the orthopedic surgeon doesn't miss the busted lip he's sporting. She raises her eyebrows as she tries to figure out how he got it.

"How're you feeling?" Addison finally asks, before Callie can decide to ask about Mark's lip.

Callie shrugs. "Pretty good."

"The pain's not too bad?"

"Not really. Bailey must have given me the good stuff."

Addison smiles at Callie's not-so-great attempt at a joke. Mark clears his throat and both Callie and Addison look up at him. Addison knows what's coming, and she straightens her posture and crosses her legs in anticipation. "Cal," Mark starts, "there's uh, something you should--"

Arizona lightly steps into the room, and everyone's attention moves from Mark to her. Callie notices that she looks exhausted - still beautiful, but exhausted.

"Keep going, Mark," the blond whispers as she leans against the wall.

"Right. We saw, uhm..." He looks to Arizona for help. What was his name?

"Jose."

"Yeah. And--"

"How do you know about Jose?" Callie interjects, fear rising up in her chest. The numbers on the machines start rising and Callie tries to force her heartrate back to normal. _Stay calm, Torres._

"I only told them that he did this," Arizona assures her. "That's all."

Callie watches the blond for another second, as if trying to decide whether or not to believe her. Even the knowledge that he did this to her is more than she wanted them to know, but there's not much she can do about it now. And they deserved to know, anyway. She nods at Mark to continue and he swallows uncomfortably.

"So I, well, I stopped him. We got into it a little bit and then Karev, Hunt, and Avery pulled me away."

_So that's what happened to his lip. _"He's not... I mean, you didn't hurt him too bad, did you?"

"Not as much as I wanted," he answers honestly.

Addison and Arizona look at Callie incredulously, trying to wrap their minds around her question. "You don't want him hurt?" Addison asks cautiously, trying to hide the disbelief in her tone.

"It's not that. I don't - I don't want him to, you know, get, uh, upset..." She tries, stumbling over her words and looking to Arizona for help. Out of the three friends in front of her, Arizona would be the only one who would understand.

"It's okay, Calliope," Arizona says, as she begins to realize what Callie means. "He's in custody."

"Custody?"

"Two policemen have been waiting down in the lobby since you were brought in," Addison explains. "Jackson took Jose down there after breaking up the fight, and they took him down to the station. We've all been talked to. They'll need to speak to you soon. Mark--"

"Told them to wait," he interrupts, knowing what Addison was about to say but not really wanting Callie to know. "So, they'll talk to Owen, Alex, and Avery before you."

She nods. "So anytime after them?"

"Yepp."

Everyone turns to look at Mark as his phone starts to go off in his pocket. He cheks the alarm he set earlier and cuts off the annoying chirping noise before looking back up and forcing a smile. Callie and Addison see right through it, but Addison already knows why and Callie doesn't say anything about it. "I'm going to go pick your parents up from the airport," he says as an explanation for the reminder. "Their flight should be landing soon."

"They can afford a cab," Callie reminds him, though she's actually glad to know that he is willing to pick her parents up. She wouldn't blame him at all if he didn't want anything to do with her parents; her dad hadn't exactly left a good first impression.

"I know, but they shouldn't have to worry about that. Besides, I already told them I would."

"Alright..."

He smiles softly, almost sadly, and this time it isn't forced or fake. "I'll be back soon," he promises as he backs out the door.

"Thank you," Callie calls after him, shifting in the hospital bed and trying not to wince as her stomach starts to throb. She just wants to get _out_ of this stupid, hard bed, and she just wants this cut to stop hurting. It's not exactly helping the other cuts that line her stomach.

Addison and Arizona share a look as he starts walking down the hallway. They come to a silent agreement and Addison stands, gracefully excuses herself, and rushes down the hall.

"Mark," she says, almost scoldingly, once she's stopped him. She keeps a hand on his arm, as if it helps keep him from walking away. "What are you doing?"

"Picking Callie's parents up from--"

"That's not what I meant and you know it."

He sighs. "Look, they'll never know. It's not big deal."

"'_No big deal_?' You might be facing simple battery charges, Mark, and that's just '_no big deal'_? You want to just waltz right out of the hospital that the police specifically told you to stay _in_side of, and that's just '_no big deal'_?"

"So I pay for the battery fine and move on with my life. It's like, what, a thousand dollars? And the cops are asking Owen questions. They aren't in the middle of the lobby anymore. Jose's in a cell across town by now. So yeah, Addison, it's no big deal." Then he drops his voice and softly adds as he tilts his head towards Callie's room, "Not compared to that."

Addison sees the look in his eyes - the fear, the desperation, the helplessness, the regret, the need to do _something_ - and all arguments leave her, because she's sure he can see the same things in her eyes, to. And if there was something she could do to help, like attack that man in the way Mark did, although she wouldn't do nearly as much damage, or go pick Mr. and Mrs. Torres up from the airport like Mark already promised he would, she would do it in a heartbeat, consequences be damned. She hates just sitting around uselessly. She wants to _help._

Right now, she can only think of one thing she can do. So despite the possibility of it completely backfiring, of him getting caught, she takes her hand off his arm and steps back. "Alright," she breathes out. "Just - be careful, okay? Don't get caught."

He nods, and starts back down the hallways with rushed, determined steps.

And Addison slowly walks in the opposite direction, feeling just a little bit lighter on her feet. She let him go. The more she thinks about it, the more she decides that she just helped Callie out. Some people might consider it as a form of lying to herself - because really, she didn't do all that much, and he would have left anyway - but it's enough to bring a smile to her face.

-----

A police officer walks into Callie's room only moments after Addison gets back in there. He looks at the three women, standing awkwardly, after lightly tapping on the doorframe to announce his presence. The blond, redhead, and brunette all just stare at him in silence and he stares back, until Callie breaks the silence.

"Is it my turn now?" she asks, trying to smile despite how nervous and uncomfortable she already is.

"Oh, uhm, no," he says quickly. "We still have a few people to talk to before we get to you, Dr. Torres. I'm looking for Dr. Arizona Robbins?" He looks at each woman, especially the two not in the hospital bed, trying to figure out which one is Arizona.

"That would be me," the blond says, standing up and dropping Callie's hand. (The brunette sighs as she realizes she already misses the contact.) She steps towards the officer. "I thought they were done talking to me?"

"We discovered some more information, ma'am," he says politely, "and we have just a few more questions we need you to answer."

Arizona nods and follows the young officer out the door and down the hallway towards the elevator. Callie shuts her eyes briefly, then lets them flutter back open and smiles at Addison.

"So, how's Pete?" she asks, wanting to have some sort of normal conversation today.

Addison shrugs. "Fine, I guess. He and Lucas and Violet are spending the day together..."

"I can go kick her ass," Callie offers. "It'll be a while, because of," she spreads her arms out, gesturing to the hospital bed, "this, but I can do it eventually."

The redhead cracks a smile. "No, it's okay. It's good that she finally wants to be a part of his life..."

"But?"

"...I don't like it."

"I wouldn't, either," Callie admits. "I mean, when--" She cuts herself short, realizing she almost said something about Brandon and Aria. She swallows, regains control, and starts again. "I wouldn't like it at all."

Addison raises an eyebrow, but says nothing about the way she stumbled over her words. Then she shrugs. "There's not much I can do about it. So... What about you? Are you and Arizona back together?"

"I don't know. I don't think so."

"Well, she's been in here just about the whole time, holding your hand and talking to you..."

"But she probably just feels bad for me."

"No, she probably just loves you."

"It's not that simple, Addison. I put her through hell, she's not just--"

"It is that simple. You two are... You're... Cal, you and Arizona are MFEO!"

Callie looks at her blankly. "You know, you're supposed to leave the drugs for the patients, Addie."

Addison rolls her eyes. "MFEO. Made for each other."

"You text too much."

Addison grins. "Sorry." Then she adds, "But, yeah. You and Arizona... MFEO."

"I screwed it all up, though, Add--"

"Oh, come _on. _You were so much better with her. She made you so happy. You were our badass, rockstar, ortho-god Callie Torres again. With a little shot of extra perky."

"I was _not_ perky."

"Whatever you have to tell yourself to get through the day, Cal."

"I just don't think she's going to want to--"

"You won't know until you_ talk_ to her. Looking at her, sitting here with you, I'd say she is still very much in love with you."

"You think so?"

"Oh, I _know_ so, Callie."

_"And I wonder if you'll ever feel the same_  
_ And I wonder if you'll be comin' 'round again_  
_ Cause you made me run when I couldn't walk_  
_ And you helped me sing when I couldn't talk_  
_...._  
_When I was dying_  
_ You became my breath"  
"_Snow Angels_" - One Less Reason_


	15. Only You

Disclaimer: Still ain't mine.  
A/N: Okay, so, this is a little bit shorter than the rest of the chapters, but I'm fairly happy with it. (: I hope you are too!

* * *

**The Scars to Prove It  
Chapter 15 : Only You**

"So, Dr. Torres--"

"Call me Callie," she offers.

He nods. "Okay, Callie, can you tell me what happened last night?"

"Jose asked me to meet him at the hotel after I got off work."

"Can you tell me the name of the hotel?"

"It was the... the Mason Hotel. Room 206."

"Okay, thank you."

"I didn't want to go, but..." She trails off, and the police officer - Officer Gragg, as he had introduced himself - merely nods.

"Can you remember what time you got off?"

"Der - I mean, Dr. Shepherd - just told me I could go home for the night, so I'm not sure exactly what time I got off. I left the hospital at nearly eight, though."

"Why did he let you go home?" His pen moves across the page furiously as he writes down her answer, slows slightly as he asks another question, and then picks up speed one more time as he writes down the answer to that question.

Callie has to tell him about her 'relationship' with Jose and she suddenly wishes that Arizona could be sitting beside her. She's still upset that they made the blond leave the room just so she could talk to Officer Gragg. Arizona wouldn't have effected anything, if that's what they were worried about - if anything, she would have made it easier on Callie, which would have helped the words come out a little bit smoother. Which would help Officer Gragg understand what she was trying to say, and keep the taste of salty tears out of Callie's mouth. She hates crying, especially in front of other people. Why couldn't they let Arizona stay?

Even though Officer Gragg tries to keep his voice calm and devoid of most emotion, Callie can tell that he is not happy with this latest bit of information about Jose. She watches as the muscles in his arms tense and his hand shakes as he grips tightly onto the pen, pressing it against the paper with more force than he did a few moments ago. His next questions come out almost forced, like he's having trouble getting the words out - or getting them out as calmly as he does, at the very least.

Finally, it's over. He puts the papers he was writing on and reading off of into a neat stack on his lap and asks his final question. "You are willing to testify against Mr. Garcia in court?"

She swallows, almost answers, hesitates. Opens her mouth. Feels her heart rate start to rise. Swallows again, and forces the word out. "Yes."

He nods and stands. Officer Gragg flashes her a small smile and shakes her hand gently. "Thank you for your time," he says politely. "I'm sorry about... Everything," he adds. "I hope you feel better soon."

"Thank you." She watches as he turns to leave, and is about to say something - but then she hesitates. She battles over it internally, until she pushes the question out as he reaches the door. "He's in jail for good, right?" she asks, hating the way she sounds like a hopeful child.

Gragg turns around slowly and smiles at her sadly. "I don't know, ma'am," he answers honestly. "He's going to be there for a while, but probably not for the rest of his life."

"So not long enough," she says as she sighs. She meant it more for herself than for him, so she's actually surprised when he agrees.

"Not long enough at all."

-----

Arizona walks in only steps behind Officer Gragg leaves, and Callie thinks that maybe she was just waiting for him to leave so that she could come back in. She lets Callie know that Addison is on the phone - she's not sure with who, but based on the baby talk she heard, there's a fair chance that it's either a child or an animal (and Callie knows exactly which) - and will probably be back soon. She takes a seat by Callie's bed and smiles softly. "How was it?"

"Harder and easier than I was expecting... At the same time," she answers, aware that she probably makes little to no sense.

"Easy questions, hard answers?" Arizona asks, and Callie can't help the smile that spreads across her face. She loves how Arizona always seems to know what she means. (She really has to stop finding things that she loves, the list is super long already.) (She really needs to stop using the word 'super,' too. She isn't supposed to say things like 'super.')

"Exactly."

They fall into an easy, comfortable silence. Callie suddenly feels exhausted and Arizona looks like she's about to fall asleep. It makes Callie feel a little bit guilty about what she's about to do, but not enough to make her rethink her decision.

"What are we doing, Arizona?"

The blond's half-closed blue eyes slowly snap open. "Huh?"

"What are we doing here? Are we... Are we friends now? Or am I your charity case? Are you wanting to get back together? Are you just trying to make me feel better? Are you just trying to make up for--"

"Calliope, you're rambling," Arizona points out with a soft chuckle as she places a hands on Callie's cheek, effectively cutting her off. She smiles at the nervous, slightly scared brunette in front of her. "I love you. You know that."

"But?" The worry seeps into her tone. Dread sinks into her stomach as she starts to assume the worse - things like, "_but I can't be with you,_" "_but I'm dating the redhead,_" "_but it's too late for us,_" "_but there's too much baggage,_" and so forth are running through her brain. If it's a possibility (a negative possibility), Callie has thought of it.

"But nothing," comes the simple reply.

Confusion replaces the dread. "What does that _mean_?"

"It means that I love you, and I'm not giving up on you."

Callie groans impatiently. "You would have made a good politician with this kind of stuff, you know that? You aren't really answering me!"

"I love you," she repeats, nodding her head slightly (Callie loves it when she does that, too, but that's something Arizona doesn't know Callie loves), "and I want to be with you."

Callie smiles brightly as tears spring to her eyes. The sarcastic comment that first sprung to her mind (it was something like, "now, there, Arizona, that's how you answer someone") has long left her mind, ever since the words started to sink in. "You mean that?"

"Of course I do, Calliope Torres. It's you... It's always been you."

Callie pulls the blond towards her by the hand and Arizona lets her until she's standing right against the bed. Callie reaches up and puts a hand behind her neck and pulls her down until their faces are only inches apart. "I love you, too, you know," she whispers before closing the gap between them.

When air becomes a necessity, Callie pulls back slightly, mentally cursing her bad lung. Usually she would have been able to last longer than that... But both women are grinning, their faces still nearly touching. A chuckle pushes its way out of Callie's throat and she whispers Addison's term from earlier, "MFEO," before planting another gentle kiss on Arizona's lips.

"_What_?" Arizona asks as they break apart again and she leans her forehead against her Calliope's. (She has to grin, because now, she can say _her _Calliope again.) Callie is about to explain when another voice interrupts her and sends Arizona jumping backwards.

"It looks like she's doing alright, doesn't it, Rosa?"

_"I wanna be in love with only you_  
_ I wanna watch the sky turn grey and blue_  
_ I wanna know the kiss that's always new_  
_ I wanna be in love with only you"  
"_Blush (Only You)_" - Plumb_


End file.
